Before you get married ask yourself: is this the person you want to watch stare at their phone the rest of your life?

basically harry was drunk when i met him and he forgot his signature so he just pic.twitter.com/22kslYufx4

People forget that body contact has already been banned in many places. Like in front of the Leafs net in the final minutes of a game seven.

Just logged into Netflix. I think they've made a huge mistake. pic.twitter.com/AcedXP7NpL

Golf is a nice relaxing way to get really frustrated and super disappointed in yourself.

Merica. Memorial Day weekend. Let's get nasty.

I’m so tired. I thought it was allergies but now I think I’m pregnant.

Medical marijuana would be taken more seriously if it didn't have names like Maui Wowie or Bob Marley's Taint or whatever.

The word "bae" << wtf is a "bae"?

I haven't been on twitter much lately but I wanted to share this beauty with you :') pic.twitter.com/NHAIAJbkRC

Colosseum, Rome, Italy #EarthPics pic.twitter.com/8ngeje7F5p

My 6-year-old literally just told me to "grow up" but I don't care because I'm rubber and he's glue.

WEMBLEY IS READY! RETWEET if you are!! pic.twitter.com/ISE3eVkHRb

*opens window adn shouts*
HELO BIG CITY DID U KNO IF U PUT A T AFTER THE WORD COOKIES IT SPELLS "COOKIEST"
"hey shut up up there!"
I WIL NOT

People that don't train and still are amazing runners piss me off.