RT and visit my website for the latest music from David Lamar!  http://www.DavidLamar.com 

Crystal Clear would be a badass name for an albino stripper.

@robdelaney everyone that owns a ferrari has paid for an abortion.

You know how apples rot when you cut them open and leave them? That's exactly what happens to you when you open up to someone.

Massive storm approaching Brisbane, Australia #EarthPics pic.twitter.com/aauVzM8Yot

Si tuviese un hotel en la playa ''Elioputa Resort''

Despite the name, XBOX ONE is not the first XBOX: one of them is a console that nobody would buy these days, and the other is the first XBOX

can't wait to be a ghost at my own funeral and stand there doing a J.O. hand motion the whole time

Arrested Development

I don't understand why blacks and whites and people of all colors can't unite against their common enemy: teenagers

Haiku:

Games, lights, sounds, buttons
Final Test: Can this toy fly?
Rest in peace, iPhone

Wish I had this house... pic.twitter.com/5d1WsXaYZe

Only 90's kids will remember this! pic.twitter.com/jrT9HFeqWQ

Pain changes people.

This Sunday on Netflix, I play a tiny role in 1 of the best comedies of all time. It's @arresteddev. @mitchhurwitz @batemanjason @arnettwill