*tweets michael* *nervous sweats* *waits for interaction* *takes skydiving lessons* *orders pizza*

Checking my phone one more time before I go to sleep because apparently 533 times wasn’t enough today.

Man shall not live on bread alone. Yet it is easy to forget this at restaurants and end up full before the appetizer.

.@arnettwill I know people make fun of me & my family’s outfits but they won’t be laughing when I definitely own the San Diego Zoo by 2016.

If you still:

Carry her bags,
Open the door for her
Tell her that shes beautiful,
And show her respect.

You're a real man.

Kirkland Signature. RT @arnettwill: Paco Rabanne, you? “@robdelaney: @arnettwill What are you wearing?”

Just when you think things can't get any worse is when you should stop thinking.

life is nothing like a box of chocolates but more like a piñata that's stuffed with bills

I miss you, but im trying not to care anymore.

Retweet if you run the 400, 800, 1600, or 3200. #IntenseEvents

I like hairy styles in women’s #trousers. RT @morgiewhite_: @robdelaney do u like harry styles

If you find that you're not spending as much time as you'd like with high school lacrosse teams, might I recommend: mid-range chain hotels

Saying "I will find you and i will kill you"

A text from you right now would be great 👌😍 >>>>>

The difference pic.twitter.com/mfkE60oVCW