I just unfollowed Taylor Swift, I'm expecting a song within an hour.

Rockhopper Penguins taking a freshwater shower to wash off the sea salt, Falkland Islands #EarthPics pic.twitter.com/VYQkYctA4E

And why do I have to enter my password every time? Is Apple worried someone's going to break into my house and update all my apps?

A man is only as good as the beard that wears him. Merica.

Millions of sperm raced to fertilize the egg that made my daughter. Reading her report card, I can't believe the best one won.

Dream Of Summer Funes - Villnöss, Dolomites, Isarco Valley, Italy #EarthPics pic.twitter.com/GVsZOHTDK3

Me, jealous of you? Bless your delusional heart.

every day I go to the pharmacy & sit at the blood pressurre machine just to feel something

I was going to bring workout clothes to New Orleans, but then I decided to not bring them and just go on living my life.

Duele saber que... pic.twitter.com/nnvTWhO8Rw

Yes, I live in an igloo and I ride my polar bear in the winter but I break out my moose in the spring. #CanadianProblems

when people fav ur tweets instead of retweeting them pic.twitter.com/OwvbmOol73

Both @mcfc and @chelseafc have donated $45k to the #care4kidsOK cause & players will wear black armbands in tribute to the tornado victims

When I stop caring...

Don't start.

Happy Underfollowed Thursday! Star this and I will visit your TL and look for sheer brilliance. No pressure or anything.