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cheesecake!!!!!!! SO GOOD!!!!!!!!!!!!! omg!!!!!! i just ate a big ol' slice!!! thank u beyonce
One day, some dude was all "You know where we should save our money? Inside a statue of a pig," and everybody went "That is a GREAT idea."
I wanna be your aspiradora. Breathing in your dust. I wanna be your Fiat 600 I will never rust.
I'm too busy being worried about my future to do anything to change it
Don't worry I'm highly qualified
[waves to credentials on wall]
Those are just crayon drawings of lions
Ugh the holidays are coming up which means all 500 of my relatives will be asking whether I've got a boyfriend yet.
i can't go out i lost my brow pencil.
Peace and Love ✌️☺️
"911 what is your emergency?"
It's my dad. He's been watching a lot of Fox News lately and sometimes he nods along like he's at a concert