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I never get drunk. I'm always drunk. I occasionally get sober.
BJP: Happy with victory.
AAP: Happy with debut.
Congress: Happy because TheseElectionsAreNotAReflectionOnRahulGandhi'sLeadership.
Well done AAP. Even Sachin Tendulkar only scored 15 on debut.
i once did a can crush for beebee and it was with a PBR can and he was unimpressed and said “that’s kmart beer” thats how i learned my place
A gay deer walks out of a bar and says, "man, I can't believe I blew 50 bucks."
I just laughed so hard at one of my own jokes in a cold room I had to use my inhaler! I am the future!
we got sad boys, we got sad girls. it's a depression party
"Definitely!" is girl for "you scare me! not gonna happen."
if she ain't foreign she borinnn
Christmas comes but once a year! So does March 8th. And August 16th. And February 3rd. And May 11th, 12th and 13th. And
pizza bites in the streets
stuffed crust in the sheets