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There's a dude who brushes his teeth at work and I'm just trying to stay on his good side.
hey SJWs why don't you talk to my friends here [kisses right bicep] ethics and [kisses left bicep] objective game journalism
I JUST GOT AN EMAIL FROM THE KIDS IN THE HALL'S "IT'S A FACT" GIRL THANKING ME FOR PUTTING HER IN THE REDHEAD HALL OF FAME
Flu Season Tip: if you cough or sneeze, don’t do it into your hands, do it into the crook your elbow or into the mouth of an anti-vaxxer.
Don't worry. You will never run out of hope to lose.
The worst part of being single is that at some point you are going to have to get to know another person
I'm so addicted to that feeling right after you work out and then don't work out again for the next twelve years.
Dog people liked Luke.
Cat people liked Han.