If Ottawa was the Cleveland Browns, they'd be ecstatic about only losing 7-3 to Pittsburgh

After all this time, it's still you.

Lenticular clouds over Mount Rainier, Washington, USA #EarthPics pic.twitter.com/jUhts3x5Bd

Calling the Hangover an "epic trilogy" is like saying the Travelocity Gnome commercials are part of The Lord of the Rings franchise.

Joey: What does a paleontologist need a beeper for?
Monica: Is it like for dinosaur emergencies? "Help! Come quick, they're still extinct!"

Every cake is layered if you count shame.

i’ve never skydived before but i’ve zoomed in on google maps really fast once

Anderson sits after Crosby's goal.

Dupuis with the shorty! #Pens have a 5-2 lead

If its meant to be, it will be.

Kissing a girl on the forehead is one of the sweetest things in the world 😘

Let it be known that two-factor authentication will now be known as:

Tufac Secure.

The #Heat don't look as good when they're playing a team that doesn't have 10 players on the injured list.

dam owl outside my house wont shutup. It keeps saying "WHO?!" & ive said "Mike Jones" like 50 times now smh #RappersWhoWentMissing

I'm the Michael Jordan of identity theft. Wait, I mean -- I'm Michael Jordan.