*Sony* forced Microsoft's hand, not the internet whining.

#TheBenefitsOfBeingAHoe pic.twitter.com/0QoTKZfrjy

I'm not ready to get married, but Say Yes to the Dress makes me want a wedding, like, now.

Who is this blonde Irish dude on my drums dafaq @niallofficial pic.twitter.com/HdxoMgxx5F

wearing an oversized shirt and no pants is probably the most comfortable thing of life

#MentionSomeoneYouveCheatedOnBefore Dudes be like "I cheated with nobody"... Girls be like "Who tf is nobody, do I know her?!"😂

If Paula Deen's not careful, she's gonna give people the right idea about southerners

Bu tweeti sadece yalnızlar fav.layabilir

i give your performance a 10… on the pH scale because that shit was basic af

"Honey come down and help me carry in all this pizza!" I yell over my shoulder to nobody so the delivery guy doesn't realize it's all for me

Worst feelings ever:
1) Being ignored.
2) Feeling like you have no one and all alone
3) Waiting for something you know won't happen

I’m not like most girls. I’m actually an overweight man

A hidden paradise - Isla De Gigantes Islands, Philippines #EarthPics pic.twitter.com/BqzsNPpECJ

"Oh, what a cute dress." -Perhaps a snake after slithering into a hose

When you fart and someone else gets blamed for it pic.twitter.com/yTWSpvOiD9