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If my body is a wonderland, it's one that was designed by Tim Burton.
No, he only hurt me musically.
My favorite hobby is staying up late and drinking about you
I miss the days when i was told to put my head on my desk.
Why did the chicken press next in power point?
To get to the other slide.
I need you to love me for *Everything* I am. Not just the parts you want to love.
No one ever has.
I don't know who the first person was to say "Great minds think alike," but I completely disagree.
Sometimes it feels like I’m drowning.
And then I remember I’M the one holding somebody under water.
Real friends don't put their babies on the phone to talk to you
I have regrets. For example, I regret not realizing how attractive I was before I went and got married.
Sorry I rear-ended you repeatedly but your rear window full of bobble head figurines were taunting me.
When I look at your pics, I have to hold my head at a certain angle. That way people can't see the reflection in my glasses.
Most of us stopped playing "just the tip" around 16. ;)
Son: am I adopted?
Me: not yet, but we're hopeful.
Sent my ex a card that said, "Get better soon."
He's not ill, just really crap in bed.
someone needs to take one for the team
and adore the shit out of me
Love in the heart.
Peace in the soul.
Calmness in the mind.
It's what we all want.
See something you DON'T like on Somebody Else's TL? Feel free to STFU & MOVE ALONG cuz NOBODY wants to hear your NEGATIVE shit. K, Pumpkin?
Ayn Rand, on dogs: "Dogs beg, expecting handouts just for sitting, denying Reason for slavish whining. There is no such thing as a good dog"