Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
The Passover traffic is terrible this year.
Everyone though Jesus was dead but turns out he was just totally blackout drunk.
Before this goes too far, we need to educate our iphone generation that video MUST be shot in landscape mode, not freaking portrait.
LOL Twitter now has this thing where I can find people I know from my contact list. HOLY HELL that's like the worst idea since Zima
Money saving tip: you don't need tissues when you cry in the shower
I put my slippers on the only way I know how. by backwards somersaulting off the bed, landing in them and then moonwalking out of the room.
I don't know why you're fucking miserable but it's wrong and you're a cunt, I didn't do anything. I love you. Don't leave me, bitch.
Twitter can be stressful but if you make it through the first 48 months it gets easier to deal with.
*signs off work email with 'man thanks'*
Do you maintain a wide stance while you tweet from the toilet?
Wow, you look so much like the rest of your family, very ugly
You are the cubic zirconia of people.
Fuck you people who can afford vacations
Putting on a duvet cover is a 2 person job. Now go away and let me make up the bed. I'll call you to come mess it up again later.
I will enjoy the weather today.
*even if it snows*
Saturday tweetin cause my life sucks
All a man looks for in a woman is someone who'd stay with him through all the problems he faces because of her.
Is that too much to ask?
I bought a bass. After spending just 3 days with it, I am already in love.
Is this a mid-life crisis thing? Probably.
Do I care? Not really.
Calling me on a Saturday morning let's me know who I need to block, unless you're calling to buy me breakfast cause I'm cheap like that
It sounded good when I wrote it! ~ said by every tweeter at least once....
If I could get all The Individualist to step to the Right, That'd be Great. Now, where where was I... http://favstar.fm/users/1knotwhole