Stupid people breed too much

meanwhile, in Italy, the PM is snorting coke off a whore saying "he got busted for THAT?"

When someone says, "I'm going to get a facial" I pretty much only think of one thing

I appreciate Republicans making those high fallootin' teachers a target while totally ignoring the Wall Street motherfuckers who raped us

I want someone who understands the subtle art of legs behind the ears

somehow my pandora got set to whiney assholes complaining about their parents

I bet the guy in the stall next to me freaked out a bit when I accidentally clicked on my light saber ap instead of twitter

it's true love when you go ass to mouth

@_vaginasaurus cock shot http://yfrog.com/h7sz0srj

I wish a tsunami would wipe out the cast from Suite Life on Deck

You mistake your follower number for people that give a shit about you

I don't often tweet but when I do, it's usually about sex

ok #1 I don't know you #2 we are in the bathroom #3 stop talking to me

There is a fine line between smelling good and smelling like a french whore from too much perfume - thank you ma'am for presenting that line

Is it wrong to be tweeting from church? Well that and surfing porn sites on phone

Currently baiting my hippie traps with patchouli and Phish albums

Michelle Bachmann - John Quincy Adams is NOT a founding father you moron

I've come to the conclusion, that in order to be in management, you need to first be mildly retarded

I'm going to try to resurrect the phrase "pull my pud"

If people new my inner thoughts, I'd have less people fucking with me