seedy underbelly is what happens when a fat dachshund walks around in the kitchen of a bagel store

say "dude" out loud until you cum

the reason men like vaginal intercourse is so that their gross dicks are hidden for a while

tweeting is the most important thing i will ever do with my life

hi would you like to come over one day i can make you dinner and then you can stick your hand down my throat and rip my spine out

this is one of the best things about twitter. agreeing about butts

im gonna die from lack of hands on my ass

check out this insight on a lyrics video of harvest moon pic.twitter.com/ziXDvn3Acx

BLOOD | PHLEGM | YELLOW BILE | BLACK BILE

being horny as a religious experience

i had a law an order dream where someone went into a sleepover and replaced all the blankets with POISON BLANKETS//?

the worst insult is 'you're not a real horse'

almost just misspelled 'working' as "WORMKING"

things i am good at: 1. shaking my ass 2. i don't remember anything else

david bowie basically is a anime

maybe 'making it' means being able to punch through a wall when your upset without worrying about the cost to repair it or your deposit

guilt is a man who rips your hair out strand by strand. he has one pinky fingernail that's extra long. he doesn't brush his teeth.

click yes if you want the cute squid to keep kissing you

petition to make 'thraft' another word for 'penis'

if you like my flesh as much as i do you should help me turn it different colours