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Dude today," I got mad swagga, keep up wit dat."
Me in response,"I know proper grammar, keep up with that."
If someone tells you that you look like carrot top, you my friend are the ultimate pussy repellent.
Knocked down a wasps nest today at work. Walked (ran) away thinking to myself, "take that, you bitch ass wasps."
Just ate a whole bag of funyuns.. The roof of my mouth feels like I was chewing in razor blades.
Worth it!
Did you yell YOLO when you almost got taken out by that vehicle? No??..shut your dirty whoreish mouth.
Wanna piss me off? Make a women I care about cry, or steal my delicious taco bell. Either or, your shit will get rocked..
Twice
I just fell asleep sitting up..I think. At what age can you apply for an AARP membership?
@chel__cle that’s a good method. People will think your crazy..and crazy scares people.
Ya I'm an adult and I'm still gonna call my sleeping attire, "sleepy time pants." problem? Go back to 2nd grade and argue with me about it
You can't force funny, understood. Mainly because I know how it feels to not be hilarious like @the_imbroglio in every god damn tweet!
Twitter is like high school, without all of the dirty sex and daycares. Ya my high school had an in house daycare. Classy joint
@chel__cle hahaha should have no problem with that if your tweeting this stuff all day! Your welcome, happy labor day lol
@chel__cle I'm thinking your are wearing your "hilarious pants" today, because I have laughed out loud at multiple tweets that you've posted
Witnessed a "man" driving a Toyota Yaris hatchback today...
Those quotes are because his man card is pending.
@chel__cle ya me too but then again if you don't check it, you sit there wondering wtf is going on, while having mini freak out moments
@chel__cle I think that webmd was specifically made to scare people. Some of the stuff on that site makes me bust out the,"oh holy shit" lol
I am an easy going, carefree, heavy equipment mechanic. hipsters and people who say yolo, stay away
