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Guy Fieri is like if the phrase "My bad!" was a person.
There's a special place in Hell for people who won backstage passes to Hell.
The "Big Gulps" scene from Dumb and Dumber is pretty much what I think of your tattoos.
Someone at this bar just played Winger which means a member of Winger is at this bar.
"Bad Company" is a song from the rock band Bad Company. It was released on their debut album, Bad Company, and was written by Brad Company.
Somewhere in my ratings of family operations, Mumford & Sons sits just below the Menendez Brothers.
Got my passport today so I dont have to carry around my dads copy of Steve Millers Greatest Hits 1974-78 as proof of US citizenship anymore.
It's like the people from 2015 in Back To The Future Part II don't even REMEMBER 9/11.
I love Black Bean Salsa. Some of my best friends are Black Bean Salsa.
Jesus is my co-pilot. ... No, wait. *wipes glasses* Sorry, that's the singer for Butthole Surfers. Nevermind.
This is a haiku.
Pretty sure it's a haiku?
Yeah. It's a haiku.
Whenever I meet someone named Jameson I'm like "haha your parents were drunk"
Whoa, whoa, whoa...An indicator for cold? AND super cold? And how much might this witch beer be costing me, sir???
I'll bet the audience in Africa goes ape-shit when Toto plays there and sings that part about Kilamanjaro rising above the Serengeti.
Let's hope these bombing suspects do to the backwards hat what Hitler did to the toothbrush mustache.
"Bunch of dumbasses on a farm."
-Synopsis of literally every Green Acres episode.
Sorry, but I can't NOT yell, "THE LIBYANS!" whenever I see a Volkswagen van.
What has two thumbs and is absolutely terrible at giving himself nicknames? Why, it's ol' Lyle "Two Thumbs" Kessler of Madison, Wisconsin!
"Habbjabbadowh of salesmen! RRRR HEEEYYYRBBAJABA OF SALESMEN!"
- Geddy Vedder
Better to be hated for who you are than to be loved for liking the Dave Matthews Band.
Social media guru helping your brand reach haha j/k just some asshole.