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A unicorn dies every time someone tweets a horoscope.
You dead people gotta stop voting
Even SpongeBob has a job. Put down the bong and apply yourself.
I will only stalk you until we have sex.
Then I won't return your calls.
Ooh baby. Let me motorboat & tittyfuck your A cups.
Shart: a fart that was actually shitty.
Twart: a tweet you thought was good but was actually shitty.
A sex offender registry, but for women that don't do blowjobs.
You bought that shirt to show off boobies to cute young guys. Stop bitching when dirty old men look too. Some of us were cute & young once.
Days that end in Y
A kid with a lisp doing drugs? That's methed up.
You reported someone as spam because they offended you? & they weren't advertising anything?
Feel better now, fucking sensitive genius?
I intend to offend all with my humor
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