Things you should avoid saying to people who talk way too much!

3) Tell me more!

2) Oh, really?

1) Hello.

Cows would have longer life expectancy if they weren't made of steak and leather.

The first rule of Fight Club: You do not talk about Fight Club... Some of us haven't seen it yet! Thanks a lot!

When it comes to tantrums, I throw like a girl.

It's kinda hard to trust someone whose expression doesn't change a little when they see bubble wrap.

Some people have great relationships. Some people have job satisfaction. I have something in my teeth.

If you have eyebrows drawn with pencil, I WILL stare.

For all those who always have their shit together, what's that like?

The internet has taught me how to laugh without changing my facial expression.

Whoever left me in charge of my own destiny has a lot of explaining to do.

why is it almost impossible putting on mascara with your mouth closed??

With twitter comes great irresponsibility.

I finally finished the Internet!


There's a twist at the end.

I'd star your tweet but you spelled that word all wrong.

So what exactly does productivity feel like?
Is it squishy?

People who laugh like this: "BWAHAHAHAHAHAHA!" should maybe just stick to LOL.

I like my things mixed. Like my drinks, martial arts, emotions and signals. Yes, please.

When you get to a fork in the road, order a large plate of spaghetti.

Nothing says "I love youuu!" quite like that one girl who's had way too many cocktails.

Without fail, I think I am bipolar at least once every month.