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What doesn't kill you makes you drink
Dear women: if you ever find yourself wondering if you're in an abusive relationship, you are definitely in one.
Easiest way to spot white people in clubs: they scream when journey comes on
Pro tip: don't change your wifi password when you're drunk
Life is easier as an alcoholic
Haha you think I can afford to use a grocery cart?
Been watchin a dude pick his nose at this bar for a whole 9 minutes. I wonder what he has up there
Very tired of stupid boys
Y'all all are the worst and u know it
Sorry not sorry 4 friendzoning
Art school is so fucked up you guys!!!!! Please spend your money on anything else.
My husband bought me kool-aid jammers because I'm sick and he's a hero
Ever been so happy you become terrified? Yeah, that's a thing.
Bars are all just potential social experiments
When the music in your headphones becomes the soundtrack to drunk couples fighting on the bus
I want to punch 99% of the world right in the face.
Absinthe will make you wake up with a couple bloody knuckles, missing shoes, feelings of shame and guilt, and no memory.
Where does motivation even come from?
Stone age lover
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