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I like my women thicker way better than quicker.
I divorced my 1st wife because I didn't like her boyfriend.
Every time Hillary Clinton talks, I can hear my first wife yelling "TAKE OUT THE GARBAGE!" And, I don't need that pressure.
You look pretty good, for a Jehovahs Witness.
Crazy AND hot!?
I'd get you a towel.
Me and my friends stand together so that the whole world will know we don't stand alone. Fuck with one, fuck with all.
They make bologna with jalapeños in it... I'll be right here.
She is hot, but I blocked her anyway... All she did was bitch about retweets.
I had to read your tweet 4 times to make it make sense.
You'd have to be over 35 to ride this ride.
That moment when you're out shopping, but have to go home because you need to shit.
Hey guys my mother called. Apparently, a person from when they were in high school together passed away... If I had to know, so did you all.
I'm probably not the best moral compass for you to have chosen.
I eat plenty of chicken to make sure your protein status elevated.
I'm going to have to stop throwing my shade. I need some sun!
Man... You are one strange motherfucker.
Can't I just sit around and finger you all day?
Just a dude doing stuff... Like, moving along... RAWR
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