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Self-pity is not the same as insight. It doesn't necessarily imply that anything is going to change.
If you want to move on to the next phase of your life, you have to be willing to let go of the last.
Agatha Christie taught me that murders are genteel affairs, carefully thought out and rationally executed.
Don't complain to me that history abused your demographic group. History abused just about everybody.
Many of life's tragedies could be avoided if there was a tape delay between brain and mouth.
Your emotions are like your children. Listen to their desires and give them space to play but don't let them run the show.
I would like to participate in this Uptown Funk phenomenon, but I'm still trying to learn the Macarena.
What makes you seem "old" is not age but the insistence on pursuing fixed goals rather than the opportunities actually available to you.
Satan has a favorite cuisine. It is called "All-You-Can-Eat".
Propaganda: feed 'em shit and tell them it's sirloin.
No cosmetology is more cosmic than postmortem cosmetology. The final makeover. Clients sit still and never question your work.
I recommend Karmaflu for all your karma-related symptoms. Karmaflu— when you know darn well you did it to yourself. Use Only As Directed.
I'm on Team Proactive—a band of unlikely superheroes who use their special powers of planning ahead to avert problems before they happen.
Why, when I was a kid we had toilets that flushed manually, so everyone did. Kids these days expect it to be done for them, so they don't.
Movie trivia: Michael Fassbender, or David 8 of Prometheus, is currently dating Alecia Vikander, Ava of Ex Machina. Amusing, no?
Wisdom from the Dalai Lama's evil twin. Your antidote to platitudes. Author. Ex Area 51 guy. Travel: @Peripatetia - More at URL...
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