Let's See.......$5 A Month For Handing Out Imaginary Trophies Or $5 A Month For A Starving Child In Africa....That Kid Better Be Funny

When The Fuck Did I Start Following You......?

Broken People Of Twitter............I Salute You.

Hey Hot Chicks That Are Funny.....Could You Make Your AVI Less Sexy So Us Married Guys Can Follow Too.
Bitches

Sometimes I Wonder.........What The Fuck Made You Think Of That Tweet...?

I'm So Motha Fuck'n Hood..........Unless Of Course I'm In A Bad Neighborhood, Then I Ain't Getting Out Of The Car.

If She's Got That Hour Glass Figure............You Better Find The Time...

Look Me In The Eyes When I'm Blocking You............

When In Doubt...........Do The Robot...

Slogan: What Happens In Vegas Stays In Vegas..

Translation: Our Hookers Ain't Saying Shit.

St Patricks Day...........A Day In Which Alcoholics Can Blend Into Society Without Shame...

I Have Two Speeds...........

Totally Chill & Complete Insane

I Prefer My Steak Raw & My Blow Jobs Well Done...........

Fuck Your Brains Out..........Zombie Sex

Is It Lying If You Are Pretending To Take A Shit So You Can Tweet........?

Even Evil Starts As Innocence...........

Excuse Me Life..........I Think This Belongs To Someone Else...

I Love Some Of You.........The Rest I Tolerate...

In Real Life, I'm Just Like You.......On Twitter, I'm Just Like Me...

Christmas Shopping For Ungrateful People........After All, That's What It's All About...