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You're right, I don't know what I'm missing by not having kids, but you also have no idea what I've gained by not having them.
I have few regrets, but probably my biggest is making all my tree forts "no-girls-allowed".
New idea: get wasted and go in for an eye exam. The glasses I get could help me see better when I'm drunk.
The thought of getting a terminal illness makes me absolutely giddy.
Michelle Obama won't walk right for a week.
When does my baby penis fall off and my adult penis appear?
Fellow runners, I found this chart and article very interesting. http://fellrnr.com/wiki/Comparison_of_Energy_Gels …
Two people have group texted me today. Both groups have received a picture of my scrotum.
69 days till Christmas! *snicker*
I'm 25, so the doctor only puts half a finger up my butt.
I just got done masturbating to the Beijing women's volleyball...
Just feels weird using my wife's computer to watch porn
Whenever my wife has a really good day I just assume her secret family is making her happier than me.
Counting down the minutes to sweet sweet intoxication.
88 days until my 100 mile race... So far I am the youngest person stupid enough to attempt the race. Starting to get nervous.
So shocked that a rapper got a big booty hoe preggers.
Please God, don't let the CEO of Culvers say anything about gay marriage. Amen.
If I don't know what to do in any given situation I blame it on having my wisdom teeth pulled.