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Neighbors just invited us to church tomorrow. I asked if they had sand, sunshine and salt water there... See you at the beach, bitches.
A movie about boxing robots? Seriously? God I hope a meteorite hits Earth before that piece of shit hits the theaters.
@toronamichele The other day my friend was saying that he wanted to wrap his cock in bacon and feed it to a hungry woman.
Friends.
Bruins fans chanting "we want cock". Silly Catholics, church was yesterday. You should have asked for more from Father O'Malley.
If that neighbor is willing to fuck you for giving her milk. I dont think your hair color matters. Stupid Just For Men commercial.
Miss USA is on. Awesome. A girl from each state that I have zero chance of ever fucking.
Please follow @misbehavingmama if for no other reason than she's a teacher and uses the word gangbang. Plus she's funny.
60 minutes is doing a piece on the Vatican library. They should do a piece on why priests fuck children.
I just got off the phone with an amazing asshole... I hope he goes home to find his entire family murdered.
@toronamichele "Ladies, your twats are a mess. Mine's perfect. Coffee, donuts and name tags are on the table by the door. "
@toronamichele what a gentleman. I'll bet he was kind enough to spit into her asshole for extra lube too. Chivalry is not dead.
I wonder if #Caseyanthony will do a double take if I used the old school pick up line of "Damn, you got some junk in that trunk."
Besides pussy and a whole bunch of other things; what feels better than climbing into a bed with fresh clean sheets?
Come on #Redwings you got this bitch wet now it's time to bend her over and fuck her. #kennypowers
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