Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
People used to say I have a mean streak.
Hey guys that can lift a gallon of milk without grunting, fuck you.
A Saudi Prince is just like a Disney Prince but without women's rights.
My bed looks pretty horny for a cuddle right about now.
Maybe it's not the drawings of your Prophet that's a problem. Maybe your beliefs in an easily offended Prophet is the problem.
Put a condom on your heart and fuck your feelings.
This smells like shit! Here, smell this!
Why is it my first instinct to take a whiff when someone says something smells awful?!
Guys named Keith know they can change their name right?
List of all things to never have:
1: Flat bill baseball hats
2: Friends who wear flat bill baseball hats
3: Meth Addiction
At least everyone is stuck inside today with the Dow crashing so bullets are harder to come by.
Global warming must be a farce because it's cold outside. Today. Where I live. (activate sarcasm font)
I want to stab your inspirational tweet right in the tits.
If I could go back in time to kill one guy it wouldn't be Hitler. It would be the asshole that decided to make raisins instead of wine.
I say put the ProBowl during the middle of the off season. Then people may actually care about it.
Funeral slow clapper. Rubber of elbows. Slapper of thighs. Eater of sandwiches.