The worst thing about being lied to is knowing you weren't worth the truth.

Masturbation is like procrastination, it's all good and fun until you realize you are only fucking yourself.

I stopped checking for the monster under my bed when I realized it was living inside of me

He is YOUR god, they are YOUR rules, YOU burn in hell.

You're in a relationship to be happy , to smile , to laugh & to make good memories . Not to constantly be upset , to feel hurt & to cry.

I feel like I'm diagonally parked in a parallel universe.

Never long for anyone from the past. There is a reason why they never made it to your future.

Never apologize for saying how you feel, that's like apologizing for being real.

May your life someday be as awesome as you pretend it is on Facebook.

Fighting for peace is like fucking for virginity.

Sometimes the squeaky wheel gets kicked.

I wish when people sucked the life out of you that there was an orgasm involved...

Do not trust people who appear to be happy all the time.

Depression n. - Anger without enthusiasm.

Everyone has a plan until they get punched in the face.

I hate two faced people. It's hard to decide which face to slap first.

A guy broke into my house last week. All he took was the tv remote. Now he just drives by and changes tthe channels. Sick bastard.

It's funny how a person can break your heart, and you can still love them with all the little pieces

It's just like magic. When you live by yourself, all of your annoying habits are gone.

It's wildly irritating to have invented something as revolutionary as sarcasm, only to have it abused by amateurs.