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“People will kill you over time, and how they’ll kill you is with tiny, harmless phrases, like: ‘be realistic.’”—Dylan Moran
Babies look like they would taste like marshmallows
Do Zombies poop?
Love = a form of amnesia when a boy forgets there are 1.2 billion other girls in the world
Why does Dracula look like a truck driver?
“Find what you love and let it kill you.”
— Charles Bukowski
There should be a tranny pornstar named ... Ima Tucker
Garfield is 34 today ... and probably has heart disease because of all of that lasagna
“When we find someone who’s weirdness is compatible with ours, we fall into mutual weirdness, and call it love.”
— Dr. Seuss
Dry hump sounds like a condition that camels would get
Jeffrey Dahmer and the Chocolate Factory
Why is it in the year 2012, we are still using brooms to sweep floors?
Ambition is just an excuse for people who can't be bothered being lazy
Why can't everything just play all video formats?
A Perpetual State Of Indifference; Geek; Socially and Sexually Retarded; Totally Inept with Women; Zombie/Horror film addict; Black Sabbath junkie; Batman buff.