I thought he was homosexual. Turns out he was just a cyclist.

Simon reminds me of Steve Jobs with the glasses.

@steve228uk Although I'm learning for the former. Mainly because you'd burn up on entering a church. Child of satan scum

@charlieekate It's impossible to sustain a smoking habit with British weather the way it is.

@charlieekate #thetrialsofawriter

@charlieekate CHARLIE. You're like my chickpea. I just chickpea love you so chickpeaing much! <3 XOXOXOXOXO

@charlieekate The tube has a new take on the classic sock full of doorknobs look for s/s12

David Cameron looking funny. http://t.co/FbgCdvy

I need a playboy license plate. It will go well with my coke habit and saggy breasts.

@hollyalyxfinch I wish my dreams were that exciting. I did once save the world with a carrier bag though.

<soppy tweet about @alxhill being great and such> Goodnight twitter. <3

Spent last night curled up with @alxhill ^_^ <3

'Share twitter with friends' What if I hate my friends?

@betterthantoday "It usually happens when we're eating chicken"

Does anyone has experience of a Yucca plant collapsing over night after being outside? It looks like a someone has fed it ketamine.

The couple next to me are breaking up. #beauty #marriage #summer

@charlieekate Such nihilist chic.

@silkandskin Go back into the closet and think about what you've done.

It's all fanmale to me.

It's been 7 hours since you tried to kill me. Is this love?