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Starting to wish I'd never tattooed the letter "Þ" on that piece of murine leather. It's been a thorn in mice hide ever since.
You see, Frankenstein was the name of the man who created him, so actually it's about ethics in games journalism
Hey girl. Are you the vestigial teeth and finger bones from the twin I absorbed in the womb? 'Cause I've got you under my skin.
Unexpected item in the Baggins' area #SummariseTheEndingOfTheLordOfTheRingsWithSomethingSimilarToWhatYouMayHearAtASelfCheckout
I might start a company selling Femfresh-type cockwash for BLOKES. It'll be called SHAFTSMASH and smell of DIESEL and PUNCHING and BEARS.
The blood vessels are full of tiny wooden shoes!
Looks like his arteries
Doctor please a man has died
The only clean mug in the office kitchen was a "KEEP CALM" one. I am sipping my coffee from cupped, scalded hands.
The endless black
Time has stopped
The earth long gone
Yet space expands
TODAY'S BIG QUESTION: Depression, or simply a reasonable reaction to the accumulation of your life choices up to this point?
I'm at Starbucks¹ with two others!
¹Coffee delivered by uncaring workers² is…
²The wind in middle America has³…
-David Foursquare Wallace
In the Cotswolds
A mini break
Rents a car
Climbs a hill
And drinks too much
Gets in a fight
I just referred to my wedding ring as "the circle of Wife" so if anyone needs me I'll be in this corner, clapping forever.
BLACK FRIDAY DEAL: Doll house which looks just like your own house, complete with a tiny, screaming you inside. £495. Don't tap the glass.
Can I boycott the Winter Olympics out of principle but still watch the luge?
It's a slippery slope.
Writer/Comedian/Wizard. Gangly one in @BetaMalesComedy (http://thebetamales.co.uk/). Half of @foodpit, Videogame Guy @ #go8bit & host of The Game That Got Away
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