Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
Last night I kept putting quarters in a broken arcade. It's the worst money I've wasted and one time I bought a truck just to piss off an ex
Some people say this website is bad but it's not, it's good.
"Let's see, we have Cats Dressed Like Cowboys 2015, Rooms of Saddam's Palace 2015, and Shots of Bieber Sneezing 2015."
Is there an industry that gets more oddly specific with its products than the calendar industry?
Ya gotta admit, Kim Jong Un is making a hell of a buzzer shot at Time Magainze's Man of the Year.
Hey North Korea, how about use your powers for GOOD! Like taking Lunchables down a notch or two.
"I'd hit that."
-people, about my face
My biological clock is not ticking but my anti-germ clock gave me an urge to wipe this kid's greasy mouth. Both clocks same deal, right?
To find out if your face is symmetrical, simply fold it in half hotdog style. Then put ketchup and mustard on it.
Usually, to calculate my own age I take my two favorite numbers and put them together in no specific order. Most times I'm 76!
♫ I am beautiful / no matter what I say ♫
Social anxiety is a lot like my fans: It exists solely in my head and keeps me grounded.
"Hey, let's not wear pants" - Models in advertisements for pants
I'm glad I'm dating someone, otherwise I'd have to hit on women by telling them I'm one of the hottest up and coming comics in LA.
I want you dead inside me
Mark Wahlberg to star in Six Billion Dollar man? Thanks Obamacare.