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Going to the drive-thru is basically me waiting in line with strangers to have an uncomfortable & awkward customer experience.
I see that several of you have decided to take the scenic route leading to common sense.
As soon as my kids' hands outgrow tubes of Pringles, I'm making new ones.
I like to spend $200 and the whole summer on a garden simply to harvest $60 worth of produce I could've bought at the store in 5 min.
I really hate it when people say I can't come up with good metaphores.
Makes me feel like a zucchini jumping on a trampoline.
No thanks, augmented reality.
Still struggling with normal reality.
Linda Evangelista once said "I don't wake up for less than $10,000 a day."
I wake up for a McMuffin.
Considering how many times it goes down on me, I'm considering dating Pokémon Go's servers.
My incense brings all the Pokémons to my yard.
"Every time someone drops the mic, a little piece of me dies."
- Confessions of an AV guy
What's the correct term for being hungover, but from food?
Fine. I'm fat today.
My special power is squinting from the sun with sunglasses perched on top of my head.
Bf: let's go fishing.
Me: we don't have worms.
Bf: (brings out lures) baby, where we're going, we don't need (dons glasses) worms.
I've just finished packing for camping and I'm already done with this vacation.
Movies have taught me that if somebody walks in on me as I'm getting out of the shower, I am required to drop my towel in surprise.
Advertiser by day, writer/cake decorator by night. Mother. Lover. Wondering what happened to the cow in Twister. http://favstar.fm/users/Carbosly
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