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Teenagers, stop looking at me like that. Someday, your metabolism will slow down, & you will look like me. Chubbiness is inevitable #prepare
We all know how I feel about kids, right? Well, there is a little girl, maybe 8, having an extensive conversation about the Tooth Fairy with
OKCupid now exclusively suggests straight men and straight women for me. I feel like that's a sign that I should just give up...
Dear pretty Midwestern girls, My life would be SO much easier if you weren't so damned friendly. Stoppit. No, never stop. No... Dammit.
My mom's eating habits actually make me gag. The house shouldn't smell like Fritos at 11PM.
Westboro Baptist Church's picketing at my alma mater in a couple wks. Apparently, the school's promoting the "fag agenda." Probs not untrue.
... And one of them just put his mouth directly on the wrapper to get the last of the cheese. Let it go, dude. It's not even good cheese.
On the choo-choo to Chicago. Nothing but beautiful, snowy farmland for as far as the eye can see.
Drag wearing, showtune singing, diva worshiping, glitter addicted gay man on the inside, film historian, theatre queen, and stealthy gay on the outside.