@iamcolinquinn No Bin Laden or Kim Jong in the In Memorium. The Academy has no class.

MLB Network was fooled by a fake Evan Grant account and this is why Twitter exists.

@iamcolinquinn "Good to see Mr. Sandler here. Hey, Adam! Your foot was on the line!" (Crowd erupts because they all saw Grown Ups)

@evil_mr_mcmahon In Russia, penis suck Kelly Kelly.

@iamcolinquinn "I don't give a care" would be the new "that's what she said", without the tasteless sexual innuendo of course.

Yeah....I just popped for Jericho.

@iamcolinquinn Just make sure the waitress isn't Ferrell in disguise.

Hey @str8edgeracer, give Verlander some pitching tips last night, did ya?

@ronniebquotes All I ever wanted was to be confronted by my friends and family and dropped off at a rehab.

@iamcolinquinn The only f-bombs I wanna hear on my television are "family friendly".

@iamcolinquinn Pot and Nazism are gateways to not keeping it PG.

I'd be moved if there were a Chris Benoit hologram on Raw tonight.

@thefakeespn In His Pants and on the Court, Lin Comes Up Short #RejectedESPNHeadlines

@thefakeespn Hamilton vs. Sobriety #BestSportsRivalry

Dear WFAA, if you did indeed report that Prince Fielder to the Rangers is a done deal, and it ends up not being true, I will end you.

@benrogers Tigers love pepper, they hate cinnamon....and Nelson Cruz.

@202friends D-Man wipes his ass with lettuce wraps.

Cliff Lee wasn't traded to the Phillies, Mariners, or Rangers. They were traded to him. #CliffLeeFacts

Cliff Lee doesn't drink Gatorade, he's drinks the tears of Yankee fans. #CliffLeeFacts

You know, Cliff Lee could just go touch Tex's leg and heal it. #CliffLeeFacts