Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
Roommate Tyler upon being asked what movie we should watch. "Not Toy Story 3. I don't think I can handle Lotso and his bullshit right now"
OMG CARRIE! DON'T LET BIG GET AWAY! DON'T LISTEN TO THAT CRAZY MIRANDA!
I didn't like the way the delivery guy just said "same as last time" just now. I didn't like it how he said it yesterday either.
I say bad words on a Harry Potter podcast because adulthood. http://thechaptertitlesweresogood.com/post/44474803327/tctwsg-4-05-weasleys-wizard-wheezes …
New favorite typo: Super Bowel
Stop touching me inappropriately you perverted shower curtain.
I don't trust people that can stand still during NSYNC's "Bye Bye Bye"
My day's productivity level is determined by how early I put pants on.
Wait a second. If you live in the UK and you want to add a video to your favorites, does it say "favourite"? #thisshouldntblowmymind
I'm waiting for the day when I text witty comments to my bank.
Was sad to wake up and not have Paula's fantastic cooking waiting for me. #missyoupie
Neighbor just told me I was mowing too close to his property. #suburbwars #firstworldproblems #stoppedmowertotweet
Can't seem to remember where I left my head and heart. My belief is Lady Gaga is somehow involved.
As I babysit my nephew I've noticed that he just eats until he passes out and also that I've never been more jealous of another human being.