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It makes me feel better to know that at some point in history even a ninja's foot has fallen asleep and he's had to walk that shit off.
Dude: Can I have your number?
Me (holding phone): I don't have a phone.
Dude: I can see your phone.
Me: I can see your tribal tattoo.
Listening to Jay-Z has taught me literally everything I know about whether or not a cop can legally search a person's car.
RT “@marsboyroy: There's a thin line between being cute and being creepy. I have no fucking idea where the line is.”
Shock
Denial
Anger
Bargaining
Guilt
Depression
Acceptance
Put on yoga pants
The 8 phases of trying to put on jeans after a weekend binge.
I just made YOLO into a verb. I'm going to go ahead and hang myself now.
“@doritosoverhoes: Jordan is Beyonce and Kobe will always be Solange.” lol @kmhxox I like Kobe, but you know this is true.
My company last night. #MovingSucks #SnugglingWithTshirts #AnotherDayInTheLife #Unlovable #HASHTAGS pic.twitter.com/wyKuPoumNG
I put my pants on the same way as the rest of you.
Begrudgingly and merely to comply with socially accepted modesty rules.
Dress & heels for my scholarship banquet pic.twitter.com/IwuhnAHcYw
RT “@thatupsdude: Nothing says "My Louis Vuitton purse is fake" like waiting for the bus.”
You better start swimmin' or you'll sink like a stone, for the times, they are a-changin'. #BobDylan
New Marvel shirt! #Selfie #SuperHeroNerd pic.twitter.com/sUvv8NwtqV
@sasspantsmcgee I'll save you some pixie dust if you wanna hop on the bandwagon with me when Peter Pan shows up at my window.
“Sleep late, have fun, get wild, drink whiskey & drive fast on empty streets with nothing in mind but falling in love & not getting arrested.” -Hunter Thompson
Stats can't be shown as @CheyTown_13 has never signed in to Favstar.
