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Who needs a boyfriend if u have a smartphone? Android(I call him Andy)is helpful,he listens,AND he even wants me to choose a ring!
Forget the shoes thing - I would LOVE to walk a mile occupying certain people's brains.
Daily tweeting times have become my non-smoker's cigarette breaks. Tough fitting this BlackBerry in my mouth & lighting it. I'll get there.
OUT: "100s of channels but nothing's on TV" | IN: "35 ways to contact you but nothing to say"
I am the guru of noticing all of the people who refer to themselves as gurus.
S.A. (I just wrote an essay.)
New rule: Every meal-brag shot that you post must be balanced by one shot of you gorging on Cheetos and Mountain Dew.
My neighbor thinks his deliberately LOUD car exhaust system is a chick magnet. And he's right! The first cop to ticket him will be SO HOT.
One surefire way to look like an idiot? Live in fear of looking like an idiot.
Tried to type to a friend that my number is "same as always" but my phone kept writing, "same as asparagus." Hopefully she'll figure it out.
Today, the form at the doctor's office asked for my height and weight, so I wrote, "Height: 5' 4" Weight: in proportion."
What's the big hoo-ha over losing some ol' triple-A status? AAA? Sorry y'all but that's flat-chested.
When life gives you chagrin, just break it down, man. It's really nothing more than a shag and a grin!
"Frankly, my dear, I don't give a duck." #ReplaceaWordInaFamousQuoteWithDuck
Do people who don't know about subtweets read thru Twitter thinking everything is directed at them? Whoa! That must be scary.
Trying to hold myself accountable for holding myself accountable.
Life is a marathon. So open your window and scream and cheer for everyone who walks by.
When there's a will, there's (usually stuff to give) a way.
Caring kook hosting media with meaning. Interviewing folks like Y-O-U. Insight binger. Wellness Warrior. Spanish speaker. Dancer-on-top-of-strangers'-cars.