@jillybobww I LOVE YOU YOU ARE AWESOME YOU MAKE GREAT ARTS INSERT MONKEY DANCE HERE!!!!!

@rodbegbie Suck It! http://flic.kr/p/8C6xYp

When I'm god-king of Earth, the 1st thing I'm doing is eliminating this whole Spring Forward bullshit. #WeNoLongerLiveInAnAgrarianSociety

@bacondogg Yeah, the Snausages will be withheld until you learn sleep with your fart bazooka aimed AWAY from me.

notes for SF iPhone users: Lonely Planet's SF City Guide is free in the App Store for a limited time.

A Reddit user reads & summarizes the actual provisions of 'Obamacare,' shaming the news media. http://t.co/sXZsKDDM (via @eaton)

It's like a Sea Merkin: RT @huffingtonpost: Octopus hitches ride on dolphin's genitals (PHOTO) http://t.co/CuYk4jSG (via @walidk)

!!! RT @ebertchicago: 15 y.o. develops test for pancreatic cancer that's 28xs cheaper, and 100xs more sensitive. http://t.co/1bUaMrsz

RT @dmataconis: The last time NC put an Amendment regarding marriage in their Constitution was 1875 when they banned interracial marriage.

@ruth_a_buzzi I disagree with that. ;) Thank you for being awesome, by the way.

@rodbegbie Yeah, but what do you have to nail to what to get THAT process started?!?!?!

Not giving this away. Just wanted to Flaunt it. (@bonniegrrl) http://t.co/JSJF8TUR

"Embrace hope and it will embrace you." via @wwwcainercom

OH MY GOD! Wine makes packing SO. MUCH. BETTER. #duh

@merlinofchaos just unlocked the "I don't give a fuck about Get Glue" badge on @getglue!!

How did the hipster burn his hand? He changed the lightbulb before it was cool.

Just in case, for some bizarre reason, you didn't believe me... http://t.co/Fhdvi2Ec

Up and down we go.: Dear Customer who stuck up for his little brother, - sweetupndown: http://t.co/aDi494JN

Hysterical! :: obtampons apologize for inventory control problems, brilliantly: http://t.co/Tj6qS3b6 (type your name) (via @neilhimself)

@torijwatson It is their job to comprehend the amazingness that is you, not your job to make yourself comprehendable.