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Fuck you, I'm a cat.
One time I had sex with a unicorn. Shit was going fine until he started quoting Sarah Palin.
A bus has driven over my tail!
Horny cats are still cats. We deserve rights. And cocaine.
Tonight I put a tampon inside my pony. Figure THAT one out before dawn.
Being a cat is hard. Especially when nobody will give you some fucking cocaine.
I really love bacon.
If this guy behind me mentions Desperate Housewives one more time...
Don't snort all of your cocaine in one sitting.
Blonde bitches love me.
Sometimes I rub bacon on my face to achieve orgasm.
FUCK YOU. I HAVE SEX WITH A LOT OF HOT MOMS.
I smell lube. :)