Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
If you don't eat black bananas, you're racist. Also, does anyone have any pepto bismol?
I have the next 30 minutes free. What should I worry about?
Take a sip out of a flask and watch how quickly people judge you.
The "just sayin'" committee has met, and have decided to revoke use of their catch phrase. Tweeters please take note & proceed accordingly.
"You unfollow people now that you have over 1,000 followers.", what does my followers count have to do with the content of your shit tweets.
Serendipity: finding something good without looking for it.
That one noodle that makes it through the strainer - that fucker is badass.
Met someone who thinks "another" is 2 words. As if some things are multiple nothers and other things are just a nother.
Twitter is a garden tool.
Clingy is never cute. Just, stop. :/
Couple retweets and girls start acting like Django.