I'm a Lit major. I did my thesis on why my car is in the front yard and I'm sleeping with my clothes on.

Me singing "Gangnam Style" without knowing all the words has been heralded as "just short of a hate crime."

"What's your rap name gonnna be?" "RZA. You?" "Uh...GZA." "Fuck you, man."

I did a remix of "Hey Ya!" called "McCoughnahey Ya!" It's just the "alright alright alright" part.

"She wears short skirts, I wear black cloaks/she's cheer captain and I kill with Force chokes" - Taylor Sith

I majored in Comparative Hater Studies at UMAD.

It's the remix to Ignition / As written by Henrik Ibsen / Makes you think about morals, and your social position

Take only what ya neeeeed from it... Oh, hi. We're MGMT. Having a new year every year is wasteful. Support our plan to make it 2008 forever.

The civil rights movement becomes even more impressive when you realize they did it all without a single retweet.

We haven't seen Meg Ryan in a while because she's hibernating in a volcano, waiting to re-emerge as MEGA RYAN.

There are no hipsters, only less-funny Kramers.

So exhausted. I'm a Ben Folds Five's "Brick" re-enactor so I had to be up at 6 AM today.

My costume is "27-year-old man who is often moved to Scarlett O'Hara-like tears of dogged resolve by the Miley Cyrus song 'The Climb.'"

Too many Urkels on your team/It must be that episode where Urkel clones himself #FirstDraftKanye

Firing @danharmon off a TV show is like firing TV off a TV show. His work represents everything good about the medium.

Dunston invented Foursquare.

(*listens to commercial radio*) "Ugh, no one makes good music anymore!" (*looks in a dumpster*) "Ugh, no one makes good food anymore!"

Game Of Thrones: Special Victims Eunuch

Thanks a lot, Macklemore. This Goodwill is filled with record execs on the hunt for new white rappers. It used to be about the CLOTHES.

"We have here the results of your fraternity test." (*opens envelope*) "Kyle... You are NOT the bro!"