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How's about we all fully disengage from the news and only listen to the first three REM albums until January 5.
My mother on Sony pulling The Interview: "It's fine - I wouldn't take a stand for Seth Rogers or that other asshole either."
Sony should just email The Interview to themselves so we can watch it anyways.
What exactly was going on in my life when I decided to give Yogurtland my email address
I, for one, would love another Bush in the White House. I would just prefer it belonged to Hillary Clinton.
Bad Ad: we have your fucking money. What the fuck are you going to do about it!? Chase. We're there for you.
The media bathes us in fear, keeping us anxious. The police state keeps us in line too. Isn't it about time you tried a Snickers!
The best part of everyone's end of year lists are the fun arguments you can have. Do you agree or disagree with the list? Let's get into it!
Buying a fourteen dollar bottle of wine at Trader Joe's is more of a baller move than a two hundred dollar bottle at a restaurant.
Ummm... question... is it wrong that I actually PREFER my Travoltified name???
I think a funny prank show would be not doing one.
I’ve perfected the art of spending $150 at the grocery store and having nothing to make for dinner that night.
Instagram me like one of your French bulldogs.
Onion writers are supposed to be anonymous, but this is my first piece in two years, and I like it: http://www.theonion.com/articles/i-dont-see-race-i-only-see-grayishbrown-vaguely-hu,37667/ … Sorry! xo Joe