Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
Just seen a woman with camel toe. And camel face. And camel humps.
Re-thinking it, she may have been a camel.
The fourth of may be with you.
Am I doing it? Am I doing the internet?
Am I meme?!
Friends? Do I have friends?
Been invited to a 6am funeral but I declined. I told them I'm not really a mourning person.
Your tweet was funnier when I saw it on a keyring in '99.
I have a sweet tooth or 'cavity' as my dentist insists on calling it.
If you can't handle me at my Recent then you don't deserve me at my Best Of.
Before twitter I used to just sit on the toilet and whisper this stuff
1 in every 93 #madeupstaturday tweets is accidentally fact.
If James Bond has taught me one thing it's that as soon as I let my guard down, my girlfriend will steal my money and run off with a bad guy
I've just seen a favstar where the one of the guy's top tweets was a manual retweet where he'd added 'lol'. WHERE IS THE FUCKING JUSTICE
Roses are STOP DOING THESE SHIT JOKES, Violets are SERIOUSLY FUCKING STOP IT.
Twitter is good because I just opened a picture of a dildo on the rush hour train and there's no way of explaining it.
My parents told me I could be anything I wanted to be, so I've chosen to be a lottery winner.
I call bullshit.
What's a TommyKarate? I hate you all, Twitter.
Lots of people with thousands of followers are thankful for discovering Twitter in 2012. I started in 2008 and I'm not at 1,000. Cuntwitter.
Going to follow myself now. This should be interesting. I bet I'm fucking dumb.
I hate tweeting about necrophilia, it's a dead touchy subject
I know I've been in bed too long when the Americans start to wake up