How did i get my gf to clean all day you ask? Simple, i smiled and wasn't a jerk.

Going to finger/fist the fuck out of this M&M's bag.

@rackofsteel @hormonella @hipchkk, mine's being fucking cute atm. http://t.co/89ZyGnEV

Watching Care Bears with the GF's daughter. While her mom's sleeping i'll intro some G.I. fucking Joe and Transformers cause i'm cooler.

@stellartwot mine doesn't have a copy but I'll give it a go. Crossing fingers!

@celichowski Ha! Good call. Totally forgot about sharks. Blind Marco polo was dangerous but i fell on my head only five times!

@celichowski i tried to avoid lava as a kid on the playground. That was tough enough.

Let there be truth ----> RT "@emceej: If I had more sex I'd be less preoccupied with how often I'm not getting it, right?"

"@ikeepittooreal: **ATTENTION*** Follow @relevanthoughts <----Cool kat

@maddyalou meh, maybe after cuddles.

@lolboobslol would someone else's mom suffice?

@1happytwit i was just about to tweet this until...nvm.

Miley, nice hair cut bro.

@juanadog i make these teenage mutant ninja turtle jammies look good. Ladies?

@themainlandblog i did on Monday. Fail?

@goodballs i dunnnoooo. That's tough.

Happy to afford netflix instead of 500 useless channels.

For 12 yrs I've smoked Urea. Which is found in cigs for flavor. Makes me nervous thinking about it. Guess I'll smoke.

Won't bother with what's tending at the moment.

No idea i had a DVD with An American Tail, Balto, and The Land Before Time. Today is officially awesome. Maybe.