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  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    Gift @Dee_spicable Favstar Pro to unlock their best tweet!Gift them Pro!

    • 175
    • LIKES
    VjayVm48Smith_Kline_DennisWaithaka_FinallyManscbahorizejrJaaayyyymthAdejokee_Gheneyole
    • 596
    • RETWEETS
    hamesjumateamtaiwantheo_mwangikawirawanyagahFarah_254DennisWaithaka_cbahorizejrBrianSaluk
    onume_
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    Sucks when I'm about to have sex & she says, 'Please don't break my heart' & I have to reassure her that my penis will NOT reach that far

    • 219
    • LIKES
    hassan_cescrogiemay_cutieeWalkingOutsideMissElaine_MMADonQuitsOatsrona65M54874986MissNaughty1801
    • 529
    • RETWEETS
    BarryRowland4h_xliPiusMuturidlavelle_TonyPace2015MissNaughty1801gakuruuKakatshozi
    onume_badplansSamzen_nerdcula_wangweFriesWhisperer
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    Samsung won't stop until they create a TV so curved it watches itself.

    • 144
    • LIKES
    m_bkagoroclaireluwieWatches_OSqoshymbuthiarragwe_Spunankiwinnie_wateraBwahaDeniseMissNakshi
    • 598
    • RETWEETS
    GeraldOloyaclaireluwiesilwaxxyI_MuliisaJude_MugabiimpulsiveosoVictorTwavicmarc_mucunguzi
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    Why do guys hold grudges against girls who rejected them so long ago? Anyway if you're reading this Mary from primary school, YOU'RE A WHORE

    • 139
    • LIKES
    wallacemoses95TweetCensorKecbahorizejrpixelspixiesBarryRowland4MissNaughty1801mesh_masiboNjengaGakuru
    • 468
    • RETWEETS
    marykaringubaronsamkarJoel_njonjotheo_mwangicbahorizejrMissNaughty1801gakuruuKakatshozi
    onume_OfficeofSteve
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    CEO: Due to budget cuts, we will no longer be having the elephant in the room
    Me: So what now?
    CEO: *Points to corner*
    Hippo: Sup bitches

    • 127
    • LIKES
    BenzerBettRaymondKoolShoeMoneycabgregjunior_ChantellePetitLe_BattousaiDedanyulengorinjerimarz
    • 438
    • RETWEETS
    I_kigeraDKurgatMs_NzilaniPhilosfyanzigareLe_Battousaidaviekimkiiru_gichora
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    Difference between dry-spell & friend-zone is that you'd rather be in a desert than being in a river with water you can't drink LOL

    • 100
    • LIKES
    derp_o_Onorarochellemarkste71128147onume_KagzthedonMiss_LynnRoseKaaru254ItsDemoray
    • 408
    • RETWEETS
    nzigestephenAnntoh__harin9t9t4EddieOtienoBillMbaumich_shellieJosaG_ChantezLeo
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    Interviewer: It says here you're a problem solver. Explain?
    Me: *Untangles headphones in under 15 secs*
    Her: GET THE CEO ON THE PHONE NOW

    • 95
    • LIKES
    crazymaniaqWildeThingyverbstractKemie_08fortunedavidwalubengovichcusculla2Albyphyfez
    • 369
    • RETWEETS
    naitwanes__Munenebobo_raasmeltinghippoinfinitykevstan_mwangi5Chap_DeeKevinWamae
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    At this rate, we can expect the 'EBOLA' movie in 2015 directed by Michael Bay, starring Brad Pitt as a Nigerian doctor who saves the world

    • 98
    • LIKES
    albywizzy__IamSteffyiam_minnaonume_itsmbuguaOfficeofVFerraoAaronAureusSicarius
    • 291
    • RETWEETS
    gikuyu254sircalicDexxeJuneWangariAnntoh__albywizzy__KTabaziIamSteffy
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    #FolderNamesToHidePornOnPc ''IT'S NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE''

    • 41
    • LIKES
    onume_Kagzthedonxysistkasumuni_iKgbenzzalbywizzy__misskerry_rogueMUGA
    • 337
    • RETWEETS
    QareoqeeiKgbenzzatldesirealbywizzy__misskerry_rogueMUGALeeSidney_denkely
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    I hope all those CCTV cameras being set up around town will capture Safaricom stealing our money too

    • 71
    • LIKES
    AlbyphyfezMellapWSermonSayzspazzle_macharianjoguNemcy_MykevecrowleneWanguiKathryn
    • 271
    • RETWEETS
    theo_mwangiBigsixsandalsmathagirocheka254irungu_kittspa2BenstoneLamsKenya_
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    Kenya would be the kid who doesn't pay attention in class cause he's too busy writing love letters to China #africannationsinhighschool

    • 66
    • LIKES
    albywizzy__onume_Inthyokasumuni_fkdonkoriKgbenzzjuniperteshFathiaXxX
    • 274
    • RETWEETS
    albywizzy__KmkubyaneInthyoNMogireiKgbenzzevakawiraNgerukNgerufwkiragu
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    Compliment a pretty girl, she'll think you just want sex. Compliment an ugly girl, she'll think you're lying. Lesson? Compliment a sandwich

    • 75
    • LIKES
    iKgbenzzMangelatoledoTAlma_NoSoulxysistc8kleggtherewillbtacosAdverseReactionerdincyilmaz7
    • 215
    • RETWEETS
    Anntoh__harin9t9t4Malloy_BryanEye3ohlerialemole_eviltwiniKgbenzzA_MaNuel_256
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    If your girlfriend never comes home complaining about the bitch at work that everyone hates, THEN SHE'S THAT BITCH LOL.

    • 55
    • LIKES
    trizahmukiriwabradonleeeyo_JoyceLornaradtoriarojjayxysistkasumuni_
    • 217
    • RETWEETS
    NdiranguKIncognito_KescoucesemurigiapolloPoLycarpFMluC_candyseif_wangiawabradon
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    A girl can't even find her bunch of keys in her own handbag, how the hell is she going to find happiness in a man?

    • 65
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    Samzen_VikkiLou_mufciKgbenzzmo_kemuntoxysistkamasiziagellafnjorwaKipKollins
    • 193
    • RETWEETS
    KnowsDavekibetpiriAnntoh__QareoqeeKenwamaAchichi65MugambiNandiKipchobit
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    Too many brands using tweeps to push their products on my TL. Thankfully, I just mute them using my HTC M9 with it's awesome camera and...

    • 35
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    BlackJermsMobileWorldNewzshlomo254espad_aRitchieOdakeXentRic_Samzen_mohamedkomz
    • 219
    • RETWEETS
    GakomeimAkay47Nel_Wamzotieno96austineClem2cooltocarejoeverhnpkBwomonoAmosMiriti
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    [In church]
    Bro Ocholla: Did you see that girl just walk by? I'd smash
    Me: Dude, we're in church
    Bro Ocholla: Sorry. LORD KNOWS I'd smash

    • 59
    • LIKES
    onume_NdegwaMnbryme84DennisBusoloSonOfNgashizakkaiseranne_kavuDjKouba
    • 185
    • RETWEETS
    EkOwMaIsSe7eddb6d18cfd44abrother_ochollaBong_FreakSonOfNgashI_am_kushSirvokeaministar
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    UK: On a scale of 1-10, how do you think my #StateOfTheNation speech went?
    Maggie: It was...*wears sunglasses* Beyond Zero
    YEAAAAAH

    • 44
    • LIKES
    PaulKamauWQareoqeeSamzen_Ruto_Kneuro_wordsjacmucjoemburuThe_Ayodi
    • 200
    • RETWEETS
    pithbwoyEye3ohmbaraniianmbundeOderoAluluTheRealShujaahivanjambaKMikhaell
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    [Bank robbery in Kenya]
    Thug 1: Put the money in the bags now!
    Teller: We're under receivership
    Thug 2: Oh man are you guys going to be ok?

    • 31
    • LIKES
    SharonKunaiLuNewell1mercysalilahMonahNjorogexysistSupremeGREAMZeniaLaforteNilikosaJinaPoa
    • 210
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    Shy_Elan_Kaytee_KGachogu_iGizzur_elvis254_Mudanya_SheilaKigutaBrack_Rebel
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    I'd rather make fun of myself everyday on twitter than pick on someone I don't know who may be going through some real tough shit

    • 60
    • LIKES
    Njogu__onume_MumakwaAndysolo_ambukuTheKenyanDreamxysistMelvinofYorkkasumuni_
    • 160
    • RETWEETS
    ITMIGHTBEBELLAKakatshoziAnntoh__QareoqeeMumakwaAndySwit_linxTheKenyanDream_Chake_
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    Sex before marriage is a sin. Sex after you're married is a miracle.

    • 58
    • LIKES
    ZuhraModaviekeymoneychelsea_kamaurragwe_SpunankiCharlohMDAVIDWAMBUI22Sayyid_Macharia_GenghisK
    • 145
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    DonMshefagathukimunduVINKIBETSharleenKendi_KimzzZBristarrrdaviekeymoneyPhranq254
@Dee_spicable

@Dee_spicable

Manspreading my way to greatness... #TheBearRises ʕ •ᴥ•ʔ #YNWA Rhythm Guitar - Last Year's Tragedy (@LYTband)

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