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  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    Gift @Dee_spicable Favstar Pro to unlock their best tweet!Gift them Pro!

    • 175
    • LIKES
    VjayVm48Smith_Kline_DennisWaithaka_FinallyManscbahorizejrJaaayyyymthAdejokee_Efemena___
    • 596
    • RETWEETS
    hamesjumateamtaiwantheo_mwangikawirawanyagahFarah_254DennisWaithaka_cbahorizejrBrianSaluk
    onume_
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    Sucks when I'm about to have sex & she says, 'Please don't break my heart' & I have to reassure her that my penis will NOT reach that far

    • 220
    • LIKES
    Albyphyfezhassan_cescrogiemay_cutieeWalkingOutsideMissElaine_MMADonQuitsOatsrona65M54874986
    • 530
    • RETWEETS
    _katunguAlbyphyfezBarryRowland4h_xliPiusMuturidanielcjlavelleTonyPace2015MissNaughty1801
    onume_badplansSamzen_nerdcula_wangweFriesWhisperer
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    Samsung won't stop until they create a TV so curved it watches itself.

    • 146
    • LIKES
    Albyphyfezm_bkagoroclaireluwieWatches_OSqoshymbuthiarragwe_Spunankiwinnie_wateraBwahaDenise
    • 598
    • RETWEETS
    stakri_giGeraldOloyaclaireluwiesilwaxxyI_MuliisaJude_MugabiimpulsiveosoVictorTwavic
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    Why do guys hold grudges against girls who rejected them so long ago? Anyway if you're reading this Mary from primary school, YOU'RE A WHORE

    • 140
    • LIKES
    Albyphyfezwallacemoses95JohnieziecbahorizejrpixelspixiesBarryRowland4MissNaughty1801mesh_masibo
    • 469
    • RETWEETS
    rangebuganya_katunguAlbyphyfezmarykaringubaronsamkarJoel_njonjotheo_mwangicbahorizejr
    onume_OfficeofSteve
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    CEO: Due to budget cuts, we will no longer be having the elephant in the room
    Me: So what now?
    CEO: *Points to corner*
    Hippo: Sup bitches

    • 128
    • LIKES
    AlbyphyfezBenzerBettRaymondKoolShoeMoneycabgregjunior_ChantellePetitLe_BattousaiDedanyulengori
    • 439
    • RETWEETS
    AlbyphyfezI_kigeraDKurgatMs_NzilaniPhilosfyanzigareLe_Battousaidaviekim
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    Difference between dry-spell & friend-zone is that you'd rather be in a desert than being in a river with water you can't drink LOL

    • 102
    • LIKES
    jkiageKiwaaBrianondiekisAlbyphyfezderp_o_Onorarochellemarkste71128147onume_
    • 409
    • RETWEETS
    WilliamLuskyKipcleophasMikohRayKiwaaBriankengwizzole_eviltwinNickiynicB3laze
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    Interviewer: It says here you're a problem solver. Explain?
    Me: *Untangles headphones in under 15 secs*
    Her: GET THE CEO ON THE PHONE NOW

    • 105
    • LIKES
    davidaha_akayculuszombiebaconlfceduhgraficxAnyila_GenghisKAllan_M_Migaov
    • 400
    • RETWEETS
    DoqktadbmubiaImprobable_EddchristymuyuIrungu_PK_GenghisKmotuBrian1Allan_M_M
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    At this rate, we can expect the 'EBOLA' movie in 2015 directed by Michael Bay, starring Brad Pitt as a Nigerian doctor who saves the world

    • 99
    • LIKES
    Albyphyfezalbywizzy__IamSteffyiam_minnaonume_itsmbuguaOfficeofVFerraoAaron
    • 292
    • RETWEETS
    Albyphyfezgikuyu254sircalicDexxeJuneWangariAnntoh__albywizzy__KTabazi
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    #FolderNamesToHidePornOnPc ''IT'S NOT WHAT IT LOOKS LIKE''

    • 42
    • LIKES
    Albyphyfezonume_Kagzthedonxysistkasumuni_iKgbenzzalbywizzy__misskerry_
    • 338
    • RETWEETS
    AlbyphyfezQareoqeeiKgbenzzatldesirealbywizzy__misskerry_rogueMUGALeeSidney_
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    I hope all those CCTV cameras being set up around town will capture Safaricom stealing our money too

    • 71
    • LIKES
    AlbyphyfezMellapWSermonSayzspazzle_macharianjoguNemcy_MykevecrowleneWanguiKathryn
    • 282
    • RETWEETS
    livinmcasirdomieogegakevin1Sir_3dwardsmohaz254atanasi_Albyphyfezgaichuhie
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    Kenya would be the kid who doesn't pay attention in class cause he's too busy writing love letters to China #africannationsinhighschool

    • 67
    • LIKES
    Albyphyfezalbywizzy__onume_Inthyokasumuni_fkdonkoriKgbenzzjunipertesh
    • 274
    • RETWEETS
    albywizzy__KmkubyaneInthyoNMogireiKgbenzzevakawiraNgerukNgerufwkiragu
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    Compliment a pretty girl, she'll think you just want sex. Compliment an ugly girl, she'll think you're lying. Lesson? Compliment a sandwich

    • 76
    • LIKES
    AlbyphyfeziKgbenzzMangelatoledoTAlma_NoSoulxysistc8kleggtherewillbtacosAdverseReaction
    • 216
    • RETWEETS
    rangebuganya_katunguAlbyphyfezAnntoh__harin9t9t4Malloy_BryanEye3ohlerialem
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    If your girlfriend never comes home complaining about the bitch at work that everyone hates, THEN SHE'S THAT BITCH LOL.

    • 56
    • LIKES
    Albyphyfeztrizahmukiriwabradonleeeyo_JoyceLornaradtoriarojjayxysist
    • 221
    • RETWEETS
    BillMbauwhizaburia_katunguAlbyphyfezNdiranguKIncognito_Kescoucesemurigiapollo
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    Too many brands using tweeps to push their products on my TL. Thankfully, I just mute them using my HTC M9 with it's awesome camera and...

    • 37
    • LIKES
    odundo_merlineAlbyphyfezBlackJermsMobileWorldNewzshlomo254espad_aRitchieOdakeXentRic_
    • 223
    • RETWEETS
    kenyan_parodyWa_KymMuzaimo__njeshiMugeh_katunguAlbyphyfezGakome
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    A girl can't even find her bunch of keys in her own handbag, how the hell is she going to find happiness in a man?

    • 66
    • LIKES
    odundo_merlineAlbyphyfezSamzen_VikkiLou_mufciKgbenzzmo_kemuntoxysistkamasiziagellaf
    • 194
    • RETWEETS
    rangebuganyab_nyambiRanjeNgige_katunguAlbyphyfezKnowsDavekibetpiriAnntoh__
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    [In church]
    Bro Ocholla: Did you see that girl just walk by? I'd smash
    Me: Dude, we're in church
    Bro Ocholla: Sorry. LORD KNOWS I'd smash

    • 60
    • LIKES
    Albyphyfezonume_NdegwaMnbryme84DennisBusoloSonOfNgashizakkaiseranne_kavu
    • 186
    • RETWEETS
    AlbyphyfezEkOwMaIsSe7eddb6d18cfd44abrother_ochollaBong_FreakSonOfNgashI_am_kushSirvoke
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    UK: On a scale of 1-10, how do you think my #StateOfTheNation speech went?
    Maggie: It was...*wears sunglasses* Beyond Zero
    YEAAAAAH

    • 45
    • LIKES
    AlbyphyfezPaulKamauWQareoqeeSamzen_Ruto_Kneuro_wordsjacmucjoemburu
    • 201
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    AlbyphyfezpithbwoyEye3ohmbaraniianmbundeOderoAluluTheRealShujaahivanjamba
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    [Bank robbery in Kenya]
    Thug 1: Put the money in the bags now!
    Teller: We're under receivership
    Thug 2: Oh man are you guys going to be ok?

    • 32
    • LIKES
    AlbyphyfezSharonKunaiLuNewell1mercysalilahMonahNjorogexysistSupremeGREAMZeniaLaforte
    • 211
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    Lovingson_Shy_Elan_Kaytee_KGachogu_iGizzur_elvis254_Mudanya_SheilaKiguta
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    I'd rather make fun of myself everyday on twitter than pick on someone I don't know who may be going through some real tough shit

    • 61
    • LIKES
    AlbyphyfezNjogu__onume_MumakwaAndysolo_ambukuTheKenyanDreamxysistMelvinofYork
    • 161
    • RETWEETS
    AlbyphyfezITMIGHTBEBELLAKakatshoziAnntoh__QareoqeeMumakwaAndySwit_linxTheKenyanDream
  • Dee_spicable
      Dee @Dee_spicable

    The number of mosquitoes that have twitter accounts and can read is the real story here tbh  https://twitter.com/CNN/status/732558662288412672 

    • 24
    • LIKES
    gathukimundukhalfan_kasurabbieGemRayMediadavidgrant100shonatigertumaloomsAlynneKush47
    • 191
    • RETWEETS
    RSYLSbrianprodeshDerricangathukimunduSainaMarleneThukuAGMr_GuantaiTsharz
@Dee_spicable

@Dee_spicable

I'm gonna give this up and become a handsome billionaire prince from Wakanda. #TheBearRises ʕ •ᴥ•ʔ #YNWA Rhythm Guitar - Last Year's Tragedy (@LYTband)

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