Instead of that creepy Elf on a Shelf, we need a Thor on the Door. QUIET YOUR WAILS, TINY HUMAN, OR I WILL WITHHOLD MY HOLIDAY BOUNTY.

me: You better not cry. Remember what month it is? 4yo: MONDAY. me: And who's watching? 4yo: THOR. me: You rly don't know the song, do you?

6yo: Mommy, that's Wesley Crusher. They call him that because you're supposed to have a crush on him. me: Honey, lemme tell you about @wilw.

SECONDED. "@dankrokos: Copy editors are the unsung heroes of publishing. Let us sing for them. #welovecopyeditors"

New #steampunk expression: TESLACLES. Like, instead of saying someone has brass balls, you say he has TESLACLES. Because TESLA.

Thought 1: I DON'T WANT TO COOK AND CLEAN. Thought 2: I SHOULD HAVE BEEN BORN A DUDE. Thought 3: OMG, HYPOTHETICAL DUDE DELILAH IS SEXIST.

Inspired by @msannaguirre, why I won't be silent about sexism anymore.  http://www.delilahpaints.blogspot.com/2013/06/on-sexism-in-publishing-or-why-im.html … Note: rape triggers.

Artist @corygodbey has a new tumblr of gorgeous, tweet-inspired artwork:  http://theillustratedghost.tumblr.com  Laika and unicorns!

Twitter: Where mornings are for fresh-faced hope, lunch is for Instagram photos of soup, and afternoon is for desperation & disappointment.

4yo: MEOW MOW MOW MOW MEOWWW me: Dude, what are you doing? 4yo: SINGING THE TRANSFORMERS SONG LIKE A CAT WHO WAS BORN WITH, LIKE, A BEARD.

Rape is rape. Ignorance is not an excuse. Neither is alcohol. No one should feel sorry for rapists who hung themselves with social media.

4yo: *tantrums* baker: Would he like a cookie? me: Thanks, but we don't negotiate with terrorists. baker: That... makes sense, actually.

If @scalzi can't say it, I will. Here's how to help authors, even if we're not allowed to ask you personally-->  http://delilahpaints.blogspot.com/2013/01/the-best-way-to-help-your-favorite.html …

Today's lesson: If a dude can jump out of a balloon in space and break the sound barrier, all your excuses are invalid. Do what scares you.

Asking that female superheroes not be 1/2 naked ≠ THEN YOU CAN'T WRITE ABOUT VAMPIRES LIKE THEY'RE REAL. Accepting magic ≠ accepting sexism.

4yo: THIS IS A BEAUTIFUL DRAWING OF A GEMSTONE. ME: Rock. Thanks! 4yo: YOU MUST PROTECT IT. me: Ok. 4yo: OR THE WORLD WILL END IN FIRE.

Books books they're good for the <3 the more you read the more you start to be smart & have lots of feels so read whatev you like. F'reals.

Genre is the shelf the book sits on at the bookstore, not the yardstick by which its merit can be determined. Period.

Facebook lesson of the day: You don't need to say "JEALOUS!" about something you could easily do yourself right now. Just nut up and do it.

Your SUPERHEROINE COSTUMES have been compiled on my blog. Guess what's not mentioned as a component?  http://www.delilahpaints.blogspot.com/2013/06/the-women-of-twitter-speak-whats-your.html …