I suddenly regret nothing, ever

You can't just eat an entire cat, by yourself, at one sitting, and expect people not to talk

The gentle knell of your death song lobbed excruciatingly into the ether

Y u no rite gud?

Your penis has male pattern baldness

Oops fucked a cactus

RT my dick off

SKELETON BONER

no capital letters ALL CAPITAL LETTERS

If you sexualize an ostrich, you WILL regret it.

Army of the Gently Burning Anus

Totally clits on the heart

Never get out of the boat. NEVER GET OUT OF THE BOAT

Oooh, it's Yucky Carolyn! How come Yucky Carolyn gets to leave so early

An injury to the brain is possible which causes you to want only goats.

I have WAY too much skin

Pill me

@dinkcheney I may be chafed but at least I'll have warts. I'm fully engorged

I'm a whitey and I'm also a bulger

McStuff this in your McSnatch.