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It's Friday, gonna get drunk, gonna get freaky, may or may not overdose with awesomeness.
My wife is now on Twitter..... Please protect me....
EVERYBODY CALM DOWN! BIG BROTHER IS ON!!
The lack of porn on Periscope is disturbing.
'I like you. Do you want to see my balls?' IS an appropriate pickup line.
If I were president twerking would be in the olympics. Nuff said.
I feel like I'm all out of stupid shit to say for the week.
Periscope is my new favorite app.
I tried to listen to Drakes CD and I felt like my ears were about to bleed.
Ladies, knee high socks. More of that shit please.
When life hands you lemons you take a knife and cut that lemons throat and watch the juice trickle out
Guess what I'm saying is fuck lemons
Squirt game strong.
It's never easy making a hard decision.
Never fails, I go to pick out clothes to iron and end up jerking off.
Ex wife is in the hospital and just like that my day got much better.
Best way to get a vasectomy, go into any Whole Foods and you'll come out without your balls.
@MrsFapFap is my boss. KCCO
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