A world where our children ask, "What's Internet Explorer?"

That's a world worth fighting for.

I’m Sim City / yes i’m the real City / all the other Sim Cities / are just Sim-itating

Breaking: Apple literally buys everything

Gonna go ahead and take credit for this idea: Siri-bombing.

"Siri, set appointmen-"
"TEXT WIFE, I WANT A DIVORCE"

PIZZ AHUT
TACO BELL
COMB INED

#KNUCKLETATS

I hope iBooks for Mac is a part of iTunes.

I don't feel iTunes does enough things.

@tapbot_paul Finder > Preferences > General > New Finder windows show:

There's some poor guy at Apple who's job is the Chess app.

"I basically just prop the door open and pee into the restroom." - All people who use a public restroom before me

rap game nap in a library

HUMANS CAN BECOME SEXUALLY AROUSED BY LOOKING AT A GRID OF SMALL COLORED LIGHTS, PROVIDED THOSE LIGHTS ARE LIT IN THE RIGHT PATTERN

Coca cola commercial, starring all the polar bears that are left

Gee, what is this @nightvaleradio shirt made out of? It’s so comfy! Also, when I wear it I can’t see my own pupils in mirrors!

Yeah @lulzsec, taking down Minecraft isn't that impressive. It does that on its own. :3

Face DOWN
ass UP
a door to the EAST
It is dark, you are likely to be eaten by a grue
> _

you wouldn’t download A GUN

Wow.  http://tapbots.com/tweetbot/mute?url=tweetbot%3A%2F%2F%2Fmute%2Fkeyword%3Fregex%3D1%26text%3D%2528%253Fi%2529%255EWow%255C.%2520twitter …

Glittoris (Clitoris + glitter)

“Arguing with chairs” sounds like:
- an old saying nobody gets
- a Coldplay song
- the name of someone’s personal tumblr blog

Hey kid. *smokes cigarette* Let me give you some life advice. *stamps it out* Don't ever install 2 versions of an Adobe product