The KKK. Whether we're talking about Kourtney, Khloe, Kim or the Klan, the motto is the same: fuck black guys.

Gotta hand it to babies, because their stupid little arms cant reach anything.

Asked this little kid what he did today and he said "colored."

I punched him in his racist little mouth.

I just saw a butterfly with a tattoo of a slut!

@amandabynes i made this to for you youre an insperation thank you and I love you QUEEN pic.twitter.com/VOY9t3xswi

I always thought it took a penis & vagina to make a baby, so it's weird I came from 2 assholes.

Never drink too much whiskey then try and have sex. I just learned that the soft way.

Trying to have make-up sex but the lipstick keeps breaking off inside me.

I'm for gay marriage but against rainbows. I don't know what to do.

About to have a threesome!


I'm 1/3 done arranging it.

A good rule of thumb is that your penis should be bigger than one.

Death is like a box of chocolates. (I have diabetes)

Fedoras are just lids to canisters of douche.

When my ex dies, you can read about it in the ho/bitchuaries.

I hate that we live in a culture that just forced me to say "a kitten I follow on Instagram."

Shirt sizes for Kardashians:
(XL)- Khloe
(L)- Kim
(M)- Kourtney
(S)- Khloe's dick

My friend shotgunned a beer and everyone high-fived him, so I shotgunned my friend and I just went to jail.


I just want to be included.

A B C D E F G H I JK I'm not gonna do the whole alphabet.

It's not rape if you scream "Surprise!" right before.

Apples I don't have to peel to eat, oranges I do. BOOM, COMPARED.