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In hell we get to read all inspirational tweets on billboards then laugh about it while we drink and stab each other.
I'm not here to be an asshole, I'm here to entertain some.
So no one has taken over the world yet? Good. I have a drinking plan.
Be the type of human that when your hand touches the bottle your demons say "OH SHIT, THEY'RE DRINKING AGAIN!"
Alcohol is not the answer, unless the question is what is life?
I've learned how to do the new twitter.
And it's fantastic. Like..... Your...... Mother.....
I ask myself if I'm ready before I cause chaos.
Your vagina isn't doing anything. And you're just here reading this tweet.
Why do you have a vagina?
Life happens so fast it's sad that you still don't exist.
I enjoy tweeters with no feelings. They're like fucking zombies.
Sometimes not all the times but sometimes, I just get drunk to smile. Just sometimes not all the times.
It's not my fault you don't exist, nor your tweets.
I must stick out like a sore dick.
If you wake up and realize you didn't drink enough, that's because beer is not alcohol.
It's not alcoholism if your liver needs fuel.
Your guardian angel is here. So don't do something stupid tonight.
I always burn bridges, it's what immortals do.
I'm pretty sure it's Canadian history month too. If I'm not mistaken.
Silently whispers to my liver "it's not your fault."
Just a drunk immortal https://t.co/wrnDOTrf0q
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