@FanEffingTastic's (Kara) most faved Tweets...
If your idea of a good time is laying in bed with a box of Trix, it is time to look at your life.
And be thankful it is so fucking AWESOME.
And be thankful it is so fucking AWESOME.
IN MY DAY WE HAD TO GO OUTSIDE AND GAZE AT THE MOON AND STARS AND WE LIKED IT.
You kids and your new fangled moon bombs. Get off my lawn.
You kids and your new fangled moon bombs. Get off my lawn.
"My 'sexdar' is so off that a guy could slap me in the forehead with his penis and I'd wonder if it was a new dance craze."
Q: What did the Easter egg say to the boiling water?
A: It's going to take awhile to get me hard, I just got laid by some chick.
A: It's going to take awhile to get me hard, I just got laid by some chick.
I love this hour of the day best.
When the toddler is napping and mommy can drink her gin, alone. Right from the bottle.
When the toddler is napping and mommy can drink her gin, alone. Right from the bottle.
You know what this day needs?
One bourbon. One scotch. One beer.
And maybe some pie. Pie is always nice.
One bourbon. One scotch. One beer.
And maybe some pie. Pie is always nice.
I always liked to think I am an outdoorsy type of girl but fact of the matter is; there are bugs outside.
Last night I had a dream about a mini sized Gandalf who stood at the edge of my vagina telling sperm, "you shall not pass!"
So that's fun.
So that's fun.
Chances are if you are using the bible as a reason to hate anyone, you have no fucking clue what the bible stands for.
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