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I’ve actually never had a meatball that was even remotely spicy.
if i ever get married i want the Hamburglar to walk me down the aisle
I don't care if my baby is a boy or a girl as long as she is a boy first.
Just cleaned my purse out. Does anyone want/need:
1) half a faded jumpsuit
2) enough hairpins to solve a murder
4) a hasty list joke
Kids are amazing when it comes to breaking stuff in your house that you previously had no idea could even be broken.
I will be impressed if all of the Joker's lines in SUICIDE SQUAD were cribbed from the jokes on Laffy Taffys.
Abercrombie & Fitch promises to tone down sexuality. So, I got the job?
Apple Watch porn is REALLY blurry!
Prediction: The new Joker bites dicks off
Yelled at my dog for pooping in the house and now I feel awful. I, too, poop in the house.
Just landed at JFK. So much porking going on.
My kids are now taking karate lessons, so if you owe me money they'll be paying you a visit in about 15 years to collect. You've been warned
We haven't heard much from Jamiroquai recently, have we?
Saw Bruce Jenner on Diane Sawyer last night. Not trying to be a snitch, but I think he had some work done.
Just saw a cop vape.
Kiss Mommy's cold sore and make it better! #RVA
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