Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
Are you going to call a timeout on this press conference or did you use all of them in the first quarter? #Askasu
Everytime I return a rental car (several times a month) they are always thrilled I didn't do things like leave Shrimp in it. Ppl are f'd up
1 big takeaway from SNL so far. JAY Pharaoh IS FINALLY DOING OBAMA!!!!!!
It's cool to think how I just started doing a new hobby last year for fun and now am performing in NY and at the CLO in the same week
Shirt that I bought last week already doesn't fit thanks to a week in Hershey
High school stoners making fun of fat people while in Taco Bell. I want to tell them one day they'll look like me
"Ben Affleck, you the bomb in phantoms!"
My mom went on linkedin and endorsed every skill I have listed, so ball is in your court potential employers.
If you elbow drop someone and don't slap your elbow first I don't even know you
The Malcolm in the Middle episode "Hal's Birthday" is just about as good as Breaking Bad's "51" His wife may actually be crazier
Looks like Pitt will fit right in with the ACC
I used to be interesting and have many stories, now I can sum up my life in less than a txt msg's worth of characters