Favstar gets even better if you sign in.
"Here I pope again on my own..." -Whitesmoke
Only time I like my hair pulled is when [REDACTED. Twitter After Dark ends at 6am]
Damn, Kristen Stewart's voice is like a 13 year old having to read a paragraph of her science manual in front of the class.
Kickstarter to install a zipline from my office to my apartment.
Gonna burn my OKCupid account and buy a husband. Fuck this mess.
Cat: (muffled) maarow? ma moow? ra moww?
[audible thunk of toy on floor]
Me: Good boy!
I'VE BEEN BESTOWED WITH GIFTS OF FAKE DEAD ANIMALS.
Just described "Today has just been a Rube Goldberg machine of fuckery." Which is kinda spot on.
Budweiser: made from the tears of middle-aged women crying to "Landslide"
Twitter is a just a forever AVClub comment thread. <3 I love you guys.
Trivial man, trivial man. Trivial man hates Apropos Man. They have a fight, nobody cares. Trivial Man.
Lou Bega in the back of his deli, Lou Bagels, crying into batter, "at least I have this now"
Ernie can sing some Tom Waits, y'all. <3
"Gosh, Facy, your life is SO EXCITING! How do you manage to keep it all together?" "Opium, dahling"
Him: I can't find my dressy belt
Me: Where did you last shoot up/autoerotic asphyxiate?
Y'all. I am a sick, sick individual.
Future husband: do not ever buy me a Pandora charm bracelet.
SHIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII ::BIG BREATH:: IIIIIT
I got a, I got a, I got a, I got a, got a pocket full of sunshine Writer/Contributor for Albany dot com's Movie Blog http://albany.com/movie-blog/