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GENTLEMAN call me your favorite sweatpants cuz you adore me & will wear my ass/crotch out, yet refuse 2 be seen in public with me
You awake to find that dogs have evolved into bipeds, with speech capabilities. Turn to page 3 to fight them, or page 72 to get dog married.
Take me down to Animorph City where the girls have beaks and there's wolves with titties.
Did u know that if a cat rubs itself between ur ankles it is marking u for purgatory? Happened 2 u? Ur name is not in the book of life.
why isn't there a black metal history month
I cruise up on my longboard, P.O.D's "Youth Of A Nation" blaring from my Beats By Dre headphones.
"Fuck school," I shout to no one.
AND i will always love u: the most passionate song ever written about two vowels in love? PROBABLY
GENTLEMAN: Call me Febreze because pretty soon you'll be obsessively wanting me to squirt all over your sheets.
What Is Kreayshawn And How Do We Keep It Out Of Schools
Capitalism indoctrinates the principle of scarcity on such a level that some start believing love is a finite resource to be competed for
LOGGED ON AND READY TO DISAGREE ABOUT EVERYTHING *kisses bicep*
I'm gonna have a little brother in 4 months & I get to pick his middle name. I like Fuckerman, Dildonger or Regulardo but open 2 anything.
"Ugh this apple juice tastes like piss!" - My Dad, totally owned after drinking my piss once when I was 5 & we went camping & I peed in cup
SHREK = Sexualey Horney Remembering Early Keanu --- really makes u think
That part in Beetlejuice where Winona Ryder says "She's sleeping with Prince Valium tonight."
go to the kitchen
& grab me a pudding snack pack