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I don't want a house like Downton Abbey but I could really use a good butler.
Putin urges a free and fair Russia where the president is fairly free to influence sentencing of political prisoners. #PussyRiot
Sry ur broke. Pay ur debts & get on w/ recovery pgm or we'll h8 u 4evr."
—txt frm any1 with $£€
"Sex & reproduction is many things but it's not science and biology"--Canada's ass't PM today.
Mom: I take enough tablets, why would I want an iPad?
Me: Let's move on. How's that man you're seeing?
Funny how my silkscreen "1100 people died to make this inexpensive T-Shirt" hasn't caught on.
Your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries, you empty headed animal food trough wiper.
I replaced a faulty ceiling fixture and now I can't stop turning it on and off to admire my handiwork.
It's not about falling down, it's about getting up. (I totally stole this inspirational motto from an angel.)