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  • Giddythefuckup
      T @Giddythefuckup

    Saw a homeless guy this mornin' he said, "Any change?" Me, "Nope, you're still cold and homeless." We laughed & laughed & he stabbed me.

    • 1,746
    • FAVS
    LIGHTSMITH79milehighocdellejizzerRAtuhairwemarcmorais10hottentotsgotTheAlexPstaceouterspace
    • 1,338
    • RETWEETS
    ellejizzervernvern21Makaveli346My_HighernessActually_JamalfablifeofclaireTheAlexPTalkinghands69
    chrisgaynernerdculachopper4jkWorldofSmithy____urbustaOncefallen________UglyPrick________
  • Giddythefuckup
      T @Giddythefuckup

    New condom slogan...

    Wrap it in latex or she's gonna get your paychecks.

    :)

    • 933
    • FAVS
    IdStandOnThatmilehighocdellejizzerJaneLikesCatsjacksonwyatt12guhli8netguardian68HNW1980
    • 543
    • RETWEETS
    kihugiQuietmonkey77pbms_bitchJonathanGoransteedsaysInterstellarFUKRobert_Beaupretty_graves
  • Giddythefuckup
      T @Giddythefuckup

    I could tell by the look on the lady's face in the stall next to me.. that it wasn't the right time to play Peek-a-Boo.

    • 631
    • FAVS
    IdStandOnThatellejizzerTalkinghands69efftenddsmidtnetguardian68JonathanGoranVerifiedDrunk
    • 297
    • RETWEETS
    Talkinghands69ddsmidtnetguardian68SunKiissdJonathanGoranCtotheASSwolfmannjrRobert_Beau
    jumpdasharkDJLIWIKZstuckwithgreenLaffingGUY
  • Giddythefuckup
      T @Giddythefuckup

    "You're ugly and you're a cunt."

    I think that's the last time my coworker asks me how she looks.

    • 603
    • FAVS
    IdStandOnThatPhillipStuerzlmilehighocdellejizzerrandomlady74NarvaezEricamyjcordovaMiniMeWeeGuy
    • 220
    • RETWEETS
    milehighocdMy_Highernessrandomlady74supah_starr77JonathanGoranrambamdayumRobert_Beausheilalastname
    DanteEvilCat
  • Giddythefuckup
      T @Giddythefuckup

    I hate to sound racist but.. all of your baby ultrasounds look the same.

    • 455
    • FAVS
    IdStandOnThatellejizzerthe_rope_girlTouchOfAlchemyTobiSinclairArmymatt22Talkinghands69spartan3855
    • 221
    • RETWEETS
    TouchOfAlchemyTalkinghands69JonathanGoranenragedpaigeRealJinjaNinjaLittlestSloboalex051496kcMcCowgirl
    ArtConDee
  • Giddythefuckup
      T @Giddythefuckup

    It's called dignity, sweetie.. and you're not gonna find it on your knees in the men's room.

    • 454
    • FAVS
    IdStandOnThatTouchOfAlchemyellejizzerBY1959davidwaynieakatinamarieArmymatt22Ctchandler247
    • 204
    • RETWEETS
    Ctchandler247Talkinghands6988shenanigansLackOfShameRealJinjaNinjanajahimariSteveBenson1LittlestSlobo
    UrinElCakeswrdsmythe________
  • Giddythefuckup
      T @Giddythefuckup

    I don't normally drink alcohol, but when I do.. it's weed. :)

    • 463
    • FAVS
    IdStandOnThatsenorlumpyellejizzerddsmidtJonathanGoranhaykshanRealJinjaNinjaMike__Lee
    • 181
    • RETWEETS
    ellejizzerBUCKEYE8508scottthetwat______jkstillstheB6ChroniclesshawnspreeTrudaciousGrumpyBahr
  • Giddythefuckup
      T @Giddythefuckup

    No girl is ever out of your league.. you just have to learn how to play the game, silly.

    • 415
    • FAVS
    IdStandOnThatellejizzerTouchOfAlchemyTalkinghands69uduuyuuJonathanGoraniwearaonesiehaykshan
    • 213
    • RETWEETS
    Talkinghands69JonathanGoranLadyDi_eicehead13ginger_xtclanadelcobain_JimiMac_ShermanParts
    VirgoSherry10InchesPlus
  • Giddythefuckup
      T @Giddythefuckup

    Dear Tampax,
    Please stop makin' the strings on your tampons so long. It's my fuckin' period.. not a visit from Tarzan!
    :)

    • 456
    • FAVS
    IdStandOnThatellejizzerTouchOfAlchemyuduuyuuJonathanGoranMike__LeeRaven0fLightSteveBenson1
    • 153
    • RETWEETS
    JonathanGoranNOLABOY33queeniecabotageBadDogJacobSteveBenson1alex051496jaggedapekolohee1
    _SirPrincess
  • Giddythefuckup
      T @Giddythefuckup

    I've done so many kegels in my 42 years that.. I can now shift my car with my vagina.

    Hello, fellas! :)

    • 448
    • FAVS
    IdStandOnThatuduuyuuJonathanGoranhaykshanVanillaRoadsSteveBenson1VirgoSherryLittlestSlobo
    • 141
    • RETWEETS
    JonathanGoranSteveBenson1kcMcCowgirljkstillskeyboredestTEDEKERTHEDUTHCHESSshawnspree
    hogrider05JerIsJoking
  • Giddythefuckup
      T @Giddythefuckup

    Jessica Simpson said today her boobs are too big for running.. maybe she should try using her fuckin' feet, stupid bitch.

    • 374
    • FAVS
    IdStandOnThatellejizzerGrannyEdnaTouchOfAlchemyTalkinghands69jcdavis2013uduuyuuJonathanGoran
    • 183
    • RETWEETS
    JonathanGoranteemercedesChoffner88HideUnderHereUncleBob56LackOfShamehaykshanPsychdelicLover
    VFlorrr
  • Giddythefuckup
      T @Giddythefuckup

    Sometimes you just have to say.. fuck it, or fuck me, or fuck you, or fuck off.



    Whatever the fuck works for ya, really.

    • 305
    • FAVS
    IdStandOnThatellejizzerspindizzyfallTalkinghands69JonathanGoraniwearaonesiehaykshanIceHuck
    • 191
    • RETWEETS
    Talkinghands69JonathanGoranViolent2Dope304kirk_flGiaMoore69Just_Jen73lavipdevinFyrekrakr73
    TampaBayMomma
  • Giddythefuckup
      T @Giddythefuckup

    Just found a bag of weed in the elevator.


    Looks like someone's gonna have a bad day. And guess what? It ain't fuckin' me! Giggity!

    • 359
    • FAVS
    IdStandOnThatellejizzerTouchOfAlchemyJonathanGoraniwearaonesieIceHuckMike__LeeLivLifeoh
    • 113
    • RETWEETS
    JonathanGoranSteveBenson1_ManFromEarthshawnspreedouglask1958GrumpyBahrmakesherownIndigoJax
  • Giddythefuckup
      T @Giddythefuckup

    I like my men like I like my milkshakes...



    thick and down my throat. :)

    • 329
    • FAVS
    IdStandOnThatellejizzerKennyDoIt2SANJAYKJ4Talkinghands69jcdavis2013JonathanGoranTiffanyChilds92
    • 99
    • RETWEETS
    ellejizzerBuh_BitchesTalkinghands69JonathanGoranhuggybear7712SteveBenson1wanksfornothingCelticHighSin
    TheCamelToe_
  • Giddythefuckup
      T @Giddythefuckup

    Guys, if there's ever a doubt just look at her feet. If they're gnarly and look like eagle talons.. chances are, her pussy's not so fresh.

    • 316
    • FAVS
    IdStandOnThatellejizzerTouchOfAlchemyJonathanGoranhaykshanMike__LeeNaughtySeclavalight88
    • 109
    • RETWEETS
    JonathanGoranViolent2Dope304queeniecabotageFyrekrakr73SteveBenson1Bro0kerSeanPG22allforandrea______
  • Giddythefuckup
      T @Giddythefuckup

    Honestly.. who doesn't like their asshole licked?


    Seriously.. they never even mentioned it in sex ed, so it makes it ok to like it.

    • 272
    • FAVS
    IdStandOnThatellejizzerTouchOfAlchemyjcdavis2013TettiVJonathanGoranJerseyKevinhaykshan
    • 77
    • RETWEETS
    JonathanGoranhaykshanjkstillsshawnspreeTnucTewGrumpyBahrMalcontent8hogrider05
  • Giddythefuckup
      T @Giddythefuckup

    Ok YouPorn, I'm flippin' a coin.. heads it's dicks, tails it's chicks.

    • 247
    • FAVS
    IdStandOnThatellejizzerjcdavis2013TettiVJonathanGoranhaykshanVirgoSherryLittlestSlobo
    • 62
    • RETWEETS
    JonathanGoranEm_Kat44kikdbakbitchshawnspreeGrumpyBahrWaterLilyDreamsShipInTheKnighthogrider05
    DarthDuff
  • Giddythefuckup
      T @Giddythefuckup

    My son forgot to hide his stash and his bong. Silly boy.. you know mama's gonna road test that shit. :)

    • 239
    • FAVS
    IdStandOnThatellejizzerddsmidtJonathanGoranVirgoSherryjkstillstheB6ChroniclesTmoney68
    • 49
    • RETWEETS
    JonathanGoranshawnspreedouglask1958GrumpyBahrShipInTheKnighthogrider05StateLineSinnerTeejayRush
  • Giddythefuckup
      T @Giddythefuckup

    Although it's been said many times, many ways.. fuck you never gets old. ;)

    • 222
    • FAVS
    IdStandOnThatJonathanGoranVirgoSherry786Sakshi123jkstillsSergioValenCotheB6ChroniclesTmoney68
    • 62
    • RETWEETS
    JonathanGoranjkstillsshawnspreeluckleprechaun1MarkLandMarksGrumpyBahrhogrider05roscoesrundown
  • Giddythefuckup
      T @Giddythefuckup

    When I'm alone I scream at the top of my lungs "WHAT'S GOIN ON?" and the 4 non blondes down the hall yell "Shutthefuckup cunt!" And we laugh

    • 204
    • FAVS
    IdStandOnThatellejizzerJuicedballsJonathanGoranMike__LeeVirgoSherryjkstillsSergioValenCo
    • 50
    • RETWEETS
    shawnspreeMarkLandMarksGrumpyBahrMalcontent8FuckPickingNameMadamBetteNoirehogrider05TeejayRush
    DudeImShawn
@Giddythefuckup

@Giddythefuckup
Pro

Take another lick, bitch.. this is what awesome tastes like.