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The problem with reaching for the stars is that it leaves your balls vulnerable.
I have retweeted better
I just spread butter with my tongue because, well, Twitter.
I don't want anybody else, when I think about you I touch myself. With a knife. Deeply into my left ventricle.
After my 10th question, my son simply suggested to me that maybe watching soccer isn't the right thing for me.
Have you thought about opening a restaurant with all that BS you serve?
You can call it "High Horse"
This all gluten diet seems to really be paying off.
Hey 12, I have a doctorate in reverse psychology.
Pretty presumptive to think a group of men that have already abandoned babies will give a shit that you're shaming them on twitter.
I baked a cake for my dad when he was in prison & hid a file inside it. The file contained a picture of me aged 7 & my 3 favourite songs.
Sorry I yelled, "shotgun!" after you sent me a selfie.
Flirting is hard.
Turn off your phone and suddenly everyone here disappears
All women are crazy. The important thing is, not all women are murderers.
Listen bro don't make me mute you forever or for an hour or until 8am..
Cause I fucking will..
Never underestimate the power of those three simple words...
... "I'm so hungry."
Just a guy, watching you from outside. -- IG, Snap, KIK: GinRumMe -- http://facebook.com/ginrumme
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