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Justin Bieber won the Milestone Award at the Billboard Music Awards. The "milestone" is more commonly known as "puberty".
In Touch Magazine says Kim Kardashian fears Kanye West is gay, which explains why he thinks Beyonce had one of the best videos of all time.
Most people see a disgraced beauty queen who's life has been ruined because of sex, drugs, and alcohol.
I see a reason to visit Delaware.
FUN FACT: 74% of the world's earthquakes are caused by Prince Fielder's home run trots.
My most popular tweet currently has 666 stars. Finally, my Twitter account has a problem that doesn't involve not being funny.
I thought the future would have time machines and flying cars. Now I know it's just a bunch of handheld devices that turned us into idiots.
If you run a parody account that steals jokes from comedians, please do the world a favor and shove a running chainsaw up your ass.
I had a couple Angelina Jolie jokes but I had a doctor remove them both from my draft folder.
"You're a Green Eggs and SHAM!!!" - Dr. Seuss' haters
"Jared: The Galleria of Jewelry should have a spokesman named Subway." - another glimpse into the dumbass thoughts of Alex Schubert
I'm just as disappointed in me as you probably are.